What I Do and Why a Used Tissue Might Kill Me One Day...

Updated on March 29, 2018
Editing in a caravan, in a field in Dorset... because why not?
Editing in a caravan, in a field in Dorset... because why not?

The perfect way to make my first personal blog entry, no?

Hi. I'm Katie, I'm a writer and I suffer from OCD.

I don't mean the 'Oh, you're so OCD!' kind of OCD. Nor the 'I have to straighten out all your artwork or I'll go mad!' OCD (though I admit that gets me, hang your pictures straight or not at all Godsdammit) I mean the genuine, diagnosed, strange-thoughts-that-make-your-brain-itchy type of OCD.

I go to therapy, I get help, I manage my condition. I write. I go do my day job and then I come home and I write. I do little else. I fill my time with words so that I spend as little of it as possible actually thinking. I have Avoidance down to a fine art form. I accept this about myself and I manage it, then I move on.

So why the article? Basically because it's hilarious. OCD doesn't care how smart you are, nor how logical. It teases you and then laughs at you until you do what it wants you to. Today I had one of those moments.

To get to the day job I have to endure the terror that is 'Public Transport.' I get on the bus (it's late but since it's always late that detail is barely relevant.) I get on the bus and 'being OCD' I stride confidently towards my spot. My seat. The only place on any bus I have deemed it is safe to sit... and today it was occupied by a horrible, manky, snotty used tissue.

I stared at the tissue and it stared at me (it was alive enough to have grown eyes.) There were two other people on the bus and I started to sweat. I was going to have to make a decision before I looked like a weirdo. The bus engine turned over, the Driver pulled away- and I'm still stuck there, staring down at this tissue and wondering what in the Hell I'm going to be able to do about it. We drove on and I could feel the other passengers eyes on me. I had to sit down, I had to stop gawking at the seat and sit in it. I had left it too late to find another seat!

I forewent my usual seat and sat in the one beside it, then spent the rest of the journey trying not to notice that the germ ridden kerchief was coming closer every time we took a sharp left turn. I took deep breaths, I plastered a smile to my face. I grinned like a maniac and realised that there was no arm rest. With no arm rest and no seat belt I had nothing to hold on to, and this wee bus pelted along the road at forty-five miles an hour, me trying to avoid this tissue whilst simultaneously hanging on- even though there wasn't a clean surface in sight!

The point in all of this is that I could have died today. If that bus went off the road I would have plummeted head first down the aisle and planted my forehead in the windscreen...and all because of a damned tissue. The moral? I need to start carrying hand sanitizer again. I suppose also maybe, perhaps, reservedly- that the OCD can make you do things that puts yourself in worse danger than just confronting the thing you are afraid of. That doesn't apply to me of course, that's just for other people. I'm just a writer with my head in the sand. Perchance I will remove it one day if it starts getting too hot.

Questions & Answers

    © 2018 Katrionawrites


      0 of 8192 characters used
      Post Comment

      No comments yet.


      This website uses cookies

      As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, letterpile.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

      For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://maven.io/company/pages/privacy

      Show Details
      HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
      LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
      Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
      AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
      Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
      CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
      Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
      Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
      Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
      Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
      Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
      Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
      Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
      Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
      ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
      ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)