Mom, Grieving & Pregnant
Before we lost Presley... Righley & Presley were plenty for us. They kept us active, busy, and always on our toes. I always knew that if Presley had a little sibling, she would be so excited. I can just picture telling her the news, “I’m going to be a BIG SISTER!!” She would want it to be a girl, and she would start playing with her dolls to practice. These are the memories that I didn’t get to have with my sweet girl.
After we lost Presley, we just knew we wanted more kids. Righley is my calm, video game loving, sweet, nanas/mommy’s boy. He’s almost 9, and completely content. Presley was my wild, loving, always up for an adventure, snuggling girl, who was mommy’s baby. She was my mini me...in her appearances and her personality.
We found out we were pregnant almost 6 months after Presley went home to heaven. I told Righley soon after we knew. I asked him if he wanted a little brother or sister, and to my surprise he said a sister. I started to think of names asking him what he thought, but he wanted to name her Presley. My heart just sank. I told him that we already have a Presley and she’s in heaven.
How do I learn to grieve, be a mom to Righley, and prepare for another little girl? First of all, pregnancy brings out any emotion that you may possibly have. It takes my grieving to a whole new level. Second of all, I know for certain that when Presley did realize she was going to be a big sister, there was dancing and smiles in heavens I don’t know how to do all three at once, and thankfully I have a very loving little boy who loves me regardless, a supporting family, and loving friends.
I’m sure when I go pick out her crib, and decorate her room... there will be tears. When I meet her for the first time... there will be more tears. It’s an emotional roller coaster, a happy, but sad time. There’s no easy way to explain it. It’s a time where I want to make Righley feel important, make sure Presley’s memories and love stay alive, and prepare for our baby girl. I do know that both of my girls love music, because they both have danced in my stomach when the music is playing. I’m sure she is going to love to love, like her siblings.
I love you way way more!