A Mother's Prayer for Her Daughter
A Mother's Prayer
This memoir recounts the story of my daughter as she explored life. The choices she was making unearthed this mother’s greatest fears.
In this writing, witness the power of prayer and God’s precise answer to my urgent pleas. Join, as I share the marvels and mysteries of a God who is personal, abundant in affection, and kind.
God targeted my petitions and addressed each one so specific that even today when I recall this miracle, I get goosebumps. God’s devotion to his kids is hard to wrap my head around, yet he poured his love out on me in abundance.
My Baby Girl
Joy filled my whole being when the doctor announced, "It's a Girl!" Rebecca was our second infant and first girl. A darling angel, she had all of my devotion. She was firmly planted in my heart long before looking into her curious little eyes. This child was a treasure and trust from God.
As her mother, my role would be essential to her well-being. The power of a mother to pass blessings or pain is massive.
Complete devotion to be her advocate and example was my goal. Prayers for wisdom flowed from my lips to Heaven’s gates.
Looking back, I remember being in the hospital. Just my cherub and me. As I observed her delicacy, she was perfect in every way. Hours were spent staring at her dainty face. Studying her uncovered every unique curve and dimple, and I memorized each one.
“You Are a Masterpiece” by Sandi Patti encapsulates a parent’s heart.
My Baby Girl
From the start, Rebecca possessed a much different temperament than my son. Daniel was a rambunctious little guy who tore around the house like a reckless tornado. He was a little show-off, and whatever was in his mind came out of his mouth. Our firstborn was filled with giggles and fun.
In contrast, Rebecca was a quiet and thoughtful child who possessed a gentle, carefree spirit. As a little one, spending time in her own little world kept her occupied for hours.
As all mothers will attest, childhood is fleeting. Enter the teen years. Rebecca was lovable and kind but was hard to read. Though conceding to obey with a slight head nod, any personal thoughts were concealed. Rebecca’s nature was puzzling. If only I understood what went on in that little head.
As Rebecca grew older, she blossomed into a stunning young lady. Her big chocolate brown eyes, framed with thick black lashes, captured many boy's attention. Rebecca’s long brown hair kissed blonde by the sun, framed her face. When she smiled, let's just say it could stop traffic.
When you have a beautiful daughter, there is a cause for concern. It is expected, she’ll receive more attention than the average girl. I felt apprehensive about my daughter's ability to handle the attentiveness she was receiving. It bewildered her when she received some inappropriate attention (she got three guys reprimanded because of inappropriate advances, two at work and one was a teacher who got fired). I had to teach Rebecca to look away when a man or boy locked eyes with her.
As a teen, she was outgoing. The opposite sex misread her warmth and kindness. Today, as a grown woman, she is still friendly but cautious with her smiles.
In high school, Rebecca started dating.
Encouraging my kids to bring their friends home helped me be aware and connected. Friends could count on popcorn, conversation, kindness, and an accepting atmosphere.
Though friendly and welcoming to Rebecca's boyfriends, apprehension was taking root. The boys she was drawn to fit the “bad boy” types. When I talked to her about the choices she was making, and with her typical nod of agreement, the conversation ended.
Trouble was brewing, and she withdrew. It was easy to observe the struggle through those conflicted brown eyes and stiff body posture. Rebecca was not a girl to be prodded, so this period was frustrating for me as a mother.
Though I couldn't engage Rebecca to talk, I prayed to a God who could read her every thought. I prayed in faith knowing that God knew my daughter inside and out and that He had great plans for her, and those plans were for good.
A Mother's Prayer
Here is where I will tell you about an urgent prayer sent straight from a Mother's lips to the heart of God.
One evening, my husband and I went to a Christian Concert which included dinner. At dinner, we sat across from a couple who were friendly and engaging. As we were getting to know each other, I learned that the gentleman was a physician and his wife a nurse.
As we chatted, we listened to words of pride regarding the doctor’s family. At one point, he pointed over to a table where a young man was carving the meat. He was beaming as he said, "That's my son, he works here in the summer." The young man was very handsome. He possessed a kind smile and his eyes were fun-filled.
The more the couple told us about their son, the more I wished my Rebecca could meet someone similar to him. As the doctor continued talking, I shot up a quick prayer and asked God to send Becca, a young man like the doctor's son.
Rebecca was proving to be a very responsible teenager. She was still in high school when she got a job working in a daycare center. Every day after school, Becca went to her job. She was faithful to her responsibilities.
As a new driver, we provided her with an old car. But Rebecca purposed in her heart to save enough to buy a car of her own. It wasn't long before she bought her first car. One day her dad took her car shopping and when she came home, her face was beaming. She bought a bright red Mazda.
Rebecca's major, as a junior in high school, was Culinary Arts. She possessed an imaginative and creative soul, and so excelled in her class. Her teacher bragged on her culinary skills.
She made many close friends in this class. At the end of her senior year, she received a full scholarship to a culinary arts school. During her senior year, Rebecca applied for a Prep Cook position at a local Country Club; she got hired. She looked adorable in her uniform with her chef's hat.
Though she was growing up, she was still young and vulnerable; innocence and naivety was in her nature. Each time she walked out the door to drive to work I prayed, "Lord protect her. You know the influences are out there." My daughter’s mysterious pondering ways did not allow me to enter the place where her secret thoughts lay.
Years later, I heard the real story, and the urgent need for those prayers for protection. One of the guys at work introduced her to Pot. She tells me it scared her, at first, because of a discussion that she and I had regarding Pot. I swear I don't remember the conversation. I'm laughing as I write because I can't even imagine saying this, but if you ask her, this conversation took place.
Rebecca relays it this way, after asking me questions about pot, I said: “Honey, pot is dangerous, people are allergic to it.” She said I looked at her somberly, shook my head and said, “In fact, some kids die on their first try.” Rebecca her heart raced, and then she asked me, “How could a person know if they were allergic?” She said I shook my head again, “One never knows until they take that first drag.”
Rebecca took the risk and tried it after a male coworker pressured her. Becca said that this guy assured her that weed doesn’t harm people. She said she used pot with caution, promising herself to be careful not to use too much.
Another story, relayed to me after she grew up, was about a drive home from work one night. The guy who had convinced her that pot was safe, gave her some at work. She explained that night by saying, "Driving home that night, out of the blue, a ginormous red firetruck appeared in front of her."
She continued, "It was reeling toward me at a breakneck speed. There was this man dressed up like a clown driving the firetruck." "What in the world!" I exclaimed. "Yes," she continued, "The truck had its brights on high, and then I saw tons of firefighters hanging off the side. They were urgently motioning me to pull over."
At this point of the story, I gasp, and she continues. "I whipped over to the side of the road just in time to see a big old truck (not a fire truck) with red flags, on its side, flapping in the wind. That's when I realized my mind, affected from pot, was playing tricks on me. I was so frightened as I made my way to the nearest gas station. After parking, I ran to the bathroom. Once locked inside I splashed cold water all over my face. I looked in the mirror and said, 'Becca, you fool, why did you ever touch that stupid weed.'" That was the last time Rebecca used pot. Thank you, God!
When she got home that night, her brother's critical eyes caught sight of her condition. He came running into the room, "Mom!" he yelled, "Rebecca is drunk!"
I studied Rebecca and concluded she was exhausted. I asked her in a very firm tone, "Rebecca have you been drinking?" Rebecca answered, "I swear to God mom, I have not been drinking!" Daniel countered her statement by saying, "Mom I know about these things, believe me, Rebecca is drunk!" I told Daniel that Rebecca would not lie to me and that I chose to believe her (Rebecca wasn't the only one prone to being naive.) In retrospect, she wasn't lying; She wasn't drinking, she was stoned!
I was always thankful that Rebecca liked going to Church and Youth Group. There were some great kids in that group. Rebecca enjoyed the Youth Group activities and meetings.
Rebecca's best friend was a year older than her. Tami was an all around good girl who had a lot of common sense. I believe God brought Tami into Rebecca's life as a result of a specific prayer. I prayed for a loyal friend for Rebecca. We moved right across the street from her.
Tami and her family greeted us the day we moved in the neighborhood. I learned later that Tami's mom had also been praying for a loyal friend for her daughter. High school girls can be caddy and Tami had fallen prey to some mean girl schemes.
Tami and Rebecca became instant friends. If they weren't at our house, they were at Tami's. I was so thankful for this friendship and knew what a great influence Tami was to my dear vulnerable Rebecca.
Tami did not hesitate to speak her mind if she felt Rebecca was making a wrong choice. It used to crack me up to see the two of them go at it during times like this. On many occasions, Rebecca would finally see the wisdom in her friend's words.
As Rebecca was experimenting with pot and working with some seedy characters, God was at work. He was about to redirect her life. It was Tami's first year of college and Rebecca's senior year of High School. For six year's these two had been inseparable.
Tami was now qualified to move up to the college-aged youth group but she wanted Rebecca to be with her. Since Tami didn't want to go to the high school youth group, it was a no-brainer, Tami would 'sneak' Rebecca into the college group.
Once Rebecca joined this college-aged group, I began to notice changes in her. After her meetings, she came home bubbling with some great stories about what went on that night.
She began to open up and shared more of her heart with me; I was relieved and happy. One night, after one of her meetings, she told me about the leader of the college group. She said, "He's so good-looking and a great teacher, but he's stuck on himself and that's a BIG turn off."
Before too long this teacher began to show an interest in Rebecca. But Rebecca wasn't interested and blew him off. One day he called the house. I can still remember his deep, sophisticated voice asking to talk to my daughter. I asked who was calling and learned it was the leader of her college group.
After Rebecca talked to him, she came bounding down the stairs to inform me that he would be picking her up for the activity that night. I asked her how old he was and learned that he was four years older than her. That explained the deep, masculine voice.
When the young man came to the door, that evening I was struck by his handsome appearance and playful brown eyes. He was very polite, smiled warmly at me and introduced himself.
As we talked, he told me about the plans for the college-aged group that night. He went on to inform me what time he would be dropping Rebecca off. They said goodbye and Rebecca trotted off after him. Though she was excited to go, it was evident that she was NOT impressed with him.
God Answered Prayer
Rebecca's college leader stopped by often. I liked him a lot and could tell he had a good upbringing. He was an honest young man. I was so thankful for this influence in Rebecca's life.
As Rebecca got to know him, she saw the kindness and goodness of his heart. She told him one day that she liked his soft side. He told her that his heart was touched because she had uncovered his outer shell.
The two of them usually sat around and watched television or chatted with me. He liked to cook. Many a day he could be found in our kitchen whipping something scrumptious up for the family.
One day when 'he was doing his thing' in the kitchen, I stood next to him watching the magic happen. We were chatting about different things and then I asked him about his family.
As he talked, I learned that his father was a doctor and his mom, a nurse. He explained that his Dad and Mom lived in a city about 90 miles away. I continued to listen as he explained that they were very involved at a Christian retreat center near his house.
I was suddenly jolted by his words. My thoughts screamed, "OH MY GOODNESS .. here, standing right before me, is the answer to my prayer from a year ago." It was Dillon's parent's that we sat across from at the Christian retreat center. Standing in front of me was the very boy I had studied, a year ago, praying that God please send someone like him to my daughter.
I gently grabbed Dillon by the arm. As he turned and looked at me quizzically, I said, "Dillon, I have to something amazing to tell you! You know nothing about what I am about to tell you. Son, I'm sure you believe, as I do, that God hears and God answers prayer." Dillon listened intently. "You, young man, are a direct answer to my prayer."
Dillon stared at me with pensive eyes as I continued to explain the dinner that took place the previous year. I told him about the night I met his parents and the evident pride they had in their son. I explained how they pointed him out to us and then I shared the prayer I sent up that night.
As Dillon looked down tending, to his stir-fry I could see he was shaken and moved. I continued, "Dillon, I don't know how your role is in Rebecca's life will turn out, but I do know God sent you to her. You may have a temporary part to play in her life, but your role is very crucial to her well-being. God sent you here."
The wheels were turning in Dillon's mind. Serious contemplation covered his face as he processed my words. I was reeling with emotions and gratitude to my God, who targeted and answered this Mother's prayer.
After that night, Dillon continued to hang out with the family. We enjoyed his calm yet charismatic presence in our home. There came a day when Dillon and Rebecca's friendship turned into something more. Eventually, Dillon asked Rebecca to go on a date with him, and, to my delight, Rebeca said Yes!
Dillon became Becca's confidant and the one with whom she shared her heart. She trusted him with her secrets, questions and with all of her thoughts. He was trustworthy. His influence was invaluable to her growth. He held her accountable for decisions she made, especially at work. What more could a Mother hope?
A Love Story
One night Dillon approached my husband and me with a question. He told us he wanted to propose to Rebecca. He asked to marry our girl and he asked for our blessing. We were thrilled and responded by jumping up and covering him with hugs.
Dillon went on to share a very creative plan to propose, which he already had in motion. As soon as Dillon had the green light he began placing calls to all of the important people in their lives. He asked them to meet at an Asian Restaurant nearby at 6 pm and then instructed them to wait for us in the reserved banquet room.
Meanwhile, at home, as the hour approached Dillon casually said, "Hey I'm getting hungry, how about going out to dinner." My husband and I readily agreed as we 'discussed' where we should eat.
Rebecca wasn't feeling good that day and said, "Why don't you guys go ahead, I need to take a nap," and up the stairs, she went. We were stunned, now what? I hurried after her, mind turning with a multitude of words I might use to convince her to join us. It took me awhile to get her to agree to come with us. I kept prodding and proposing different arguments, though she was reluctant she finally consented. Whew, what a scare.
As we walked into the restaurant Dillon suggested seating in the banquet room. Turning to walk to the room, I kept my eyes on Rebecca. She spied some friends sitting at one of the tables. Rebecca pointed and said, "David, look who's here." As they were talking to their friends she caught a glimpse of another group of friends. "Oh my goodness," she whispered, "Look who else is here."
Saying goodbye to one table of friends she walked to the next. Looking around she was shocked to see table after table filled with friend's and family. She shook her head thinking, "What are the chances that all of these friends would choose to eat at the same place on the same night?" It was hilarious to watch her expressions change from excitement to confusion and bewilderment.
As we took our seats and the waitress poured our drinks, Dillon got up and pulled a chair to the center of the room. He smiled at Rebecca and asked her, in his commanding teachers voice, "Rebecca, would you please come and sit in this chair?" Rebecca was horrified. She shook her head NO, thinking Dillon must have lost his mind. But Dillon continued to smile reassuringly and asked again and again until she gave in and sauntered over to the chair. She looked mortified!
She looked so beautiful and vulnerable sitting there waiting. Next, he knelt before her and with a heart full of love asked her to be his wife. Her hands went to her mouth as a broad smile broke out underneath them. She managed to cry out "Yes, yes I will marry you!" Tears streamed down her face and the room broke out with applause. It is a day none of us will ever forget.
Today Rebecca and Dillon are married. They are a very strong and capable couple. Rebecca's creative soul covers and blesses her family, house and everything she touches. Dillon's strong presence and love for his family is unshakable.
He is Rebecca's Rock, and to me, he will forever be a type of hero sent by God in answer to my prayer.
They are an example to all who know them, an example of true love and commitment. I pray that their lives will continue to blend and strengthen as they work together complementing each other. I believe with all my heart that they will continue, as they say in fairy tales, to live Happily Ever After.
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Questions & Answers
When will my daughter realize her wrongdoings?
There is no way, we as humans, can know when she will acknowledge her wrongdoings. But pray that God opens her spiritual eyes so she sees her need of Him.Helpful 8
How do I pray for my adult daughter to meet an honest and committed man to share her life with?
Pray, just as I prayed, believing God hears and answers prayer.Helpful 17
Do you do prayer request ?
Absolutely! If you want to write me personally, click under my picture on 'contact author.' I'd be honored to pray for your situation.Helpful 8
I’m scared for my teenage daughter. She is in an unhealthy relationship with an unbeliever. They are already talking about marriage after high school. How should I pray?
Is your daughter familiar with II Corinthians 6:14 "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?" Does she claim to know and love Jesus? Pray for God to work in her heart. Pray that she bows to God and surrenders her life to Him. God knows what your daughter needs and He has amazing plans for her life. I will pray she trusts God with her life and has faith to follow his commands, no matter how she feels.Helpful 7
Can a wife pray for her husband to become a Christian?
Absolutely! Pray and ask God to open his spiritual eyes.Helpful 4
© 2010 Susan Ream