Marilyn Briant is the author of The Pax Principles - a Red Ribbon Winner 2020, in The Wishing Shelf Book Awards (UK)
I Am Here For The Experience
These days I aspire to believe all is well, in part because I am truly fed up with the media and its unending mantra all is not well. And, because I understand everything I encounter provides an opportunity for learning and increasing my awareness.
I don’t want to ignore reality. Or fight it. Instead, I want to accept it and still be an expression of light and love, believing all is well.
Acknowledging I am here for the experience, I consciously strive not to label what is going on around me as good or bad. I understand it is what it is. And through constantly questioning what initially seems to be true for everyone, I give myself permission to find what is actually true for me.
No Longer Asleep
It involves moment-to-moment decision-making, because having woken up to the presence of fear (my ego) in my thoughts, I now allow my soul energy to decide the truth—to show me what I want to see, what I want to focus on. To remind me I am no longer powerless and encourage me to believe all is well.
I need no reminder, however, to recall that I was asleep for many years. I was all too familiar with the nightmare in which so many are still living. Lost in the conflicting emotions I used to think were an essential part of life, pulled every which way, I remember it was impossible to believe all is well.
Yes, I have been there in that unawake state, so I know how it feels. I could find no meaning, little peace in my life, because everything was drama. There was always some calamity, some sad, painful or destructive situation going on, or some terrible way in which I was treated.
Making statements like: Why is this happening to me; I don’t deserve this; I can’t understand why nothing works out for me; I don’t know why people are so cruel/mean/angry, I was one of those still asleep, suffering and struggling to deal with what I perceived as the inevitable difficulties of life.
And because I was asleep, I could not see I was creating the nightmare—all the drama in which I was involved. I felt helpless, like I was floating in a sea of anxiety. My life seemed perpetually disappointing and the idea of having any kind of lasting happiness or peace life seemed like an unreachable dream.
Freedom Comes From Being Awake
It helps to remember this sometimes. To think about the positive changes I’ve made, that we can all make in the way we think about ourselves and life. To remind myself that despite all the negativity we are bombarded with, it does not represent the world I live in, which is full of kind, caring, compassionate people.
But I am not invincible. I admit I catch myself nodding off from time to time: I say, “Oh, that is so sad” in conversation, or get caught up in criticizing someone, or join them in complaining about a difficult situation.
Momentarily, not recognizing fear for the prison it really is, I am held in its grip—trapped in my judgmental thoughts—focused on the need to fit in, win at any cost, or seemingly ready to choke on unmet expectations.
But freedom is just around the corner. As soon as my soul-self assures me once again all is well, fear retreats and the bad dream ends.
Following A Spiritual Path Is A Choice
Perhaps just observing those around me who are still asleep keeps me awake almost all the time. And even though I confess to wanting to wake them up sometimes, I know in my heart that is not up to me to do so. I believe each of us needs to emerge from the nightmare in our own good time.
Following a spiritual path is a choice—a life-changing decision about how I want to live, and what I want to experience. It means I accept what is and let go of the need to control anything going on around me. I remain centered and relaxed. It means I willingly become responsible for myself, my own beliefs, my own happiness, my own reality.
It means I have discovered there is a loveliness and beauty in living. I have found meaning and order in what appears chaotic. I am comfortable questioning what seems to be true and accepting a different truth.
And these days I find it easy to be awed by the changes I have made as a result of being awake. I willingly embrace the responsibility I have taken for my own feelings, my own joy. I hold a deep appreciation in my heart, for the deep inner peace that comes from believing all is well.