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36 Funny Tall People Jokes

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tall-people-jokes

Short people say that God only lets people grow until they're perfect. Therefore, short people just didn't take as long as others to reach perfection (ahem, tall people).

Although you tall people may disagree with this assertion and crack a joke about short people in response, short people jokes are just too common and overused!

For a long time, short people have been the target of jokes because of their height, but let’s face it, tall people; the tall life isn’t all hunky dory, is it?

You are always hitting your head on things, stubbing those long toes of yours, and forget ever finding shoes that fit you in a normal store!

Every shirt you buy shrinks into a crop top after the first wash, and you're the reason high waters pants got their name!

So laugh it up, tall people, because we (short people) are ready to make a comeback.

To keep making fun of tall people, since they deserve it, here is a list of 36 jokes at the expense of our giraffe-like friends.

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Time for Funnies

  • What do a tall wizard and a tall elf have in common? They both needed a short hobbit to save their butts.
  • Have you ever noticed that there is a garment called shorts? Because I can’t recall ever seeing a piece of clothing called talls.
  • Why were shorts invented? So tall people wouldn’t look like they’re always wearing capris.
  • What do you call a big and tall store? Unfortunate.
  • Where did the tall person find a boyfriend? At the top of a step ladder.
  • What’s the difference between a clown and a tall person? Their shoe store.
  • It's not tall people's fault they think they're the center of the universe. They just can't see anyone else.
  • What does a tall person do when they see an airplane coming? Duck.
  • What happened when the tall person wanted to hang himself? Nothing, he couldn't find a high enough ceiling.
  • How'd the tall person break into working at Wells Fargo? After 6 years of being an excellent coat rack, they decided to let her have her own desk.
  • Yo mama so tall she tripped on a rock and hit the moon.
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  • What do tall people and Bode Miller have in common? They both look like they're wearing skis.
  • How do you make a tall person look more awkward? You can’t.
  • What do tall people and a lamp post have in common? Intelligence.
  • What does a tall person and a burnt out lightbulb have in common? They’re not that bright.
  • What do you call a tall, attractive person? An evolutionary miracle.
  • What do tall people and chopsticks have in common? They're awkward at the most inopportune moments.
  • What’s a tall person’s worst fear? Ceiling fans.
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  • Yo mamma so tall she uses the Empire State Building as a toothpick.
  • Do you know why most supermodels are really tall? Because if they can look good in the outfit, anyone can.
  • Do you know what Victoria’s Secret actually is? She likes short guys.
  • How many tall people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2. One to get a chair and the other one to call a short person for help.
  • What did the tall person say to the short person? What?
  • What's the most popular sport for tall women? Wrestling each other over men who are taller than them.
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  • The other day I Googled “tall people." Funny thing was, Google only showed results for “dumb people.”
  • Tall people: the giraffes of the human race since the beginning of time.
  • Tall people look like slinkies when they run.
  • Tall people are only good for two things: Laughing at them, and getting things from the top shelf.
  • Every time a tall person bumps their head, somewhere a short person is smiling.
  • What's the difference between a tall person and a broom? A broom is useful.
  • Tall people: where the family will meet if someone gets lost in a crowd.
  • Where do tall people find significant others? Out back behind the big and tall store, weeping.
  • How do you make a tall person angry? Pick them up in a smart car.
  • Yo mama so tall that when I told her to take one step back she went to the other side of the world.
  • What’s the difference between a 5 foot-tall person and a 6-foot-tall person? One person has an extra foot of height, and the other has a brain.
  • Inside every short man is a tall man doubled over in pain.
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A Couple More From the Comments

  • With a tall person at home, you won't ever need a ladder.
  • A big benefit of tall people is that you don't need to come downstairs to shake their hand. You can do it right from the balcony.
  • You don't need to turn your back if you want to avoid a tall person. You can walk straight just in front of him without ever being caught.
  • With a tall friend, you can swim as far as you want in the river for you will be at his hand when in danger.

It's Just a Joke!

See, tall people jokes are just as funny as short people jokes, if not more! If you are a short person telling these jokes, take note of all of the tall people just kinda awkwardly standing there, perhaps letting out a nervous laugh to try to fit in, even though they can’t fit into their own clothes.

Just let it soak in, and embrace the moment since for once you are not the target of cruel height jokes!

I’m sure you’ve thoroughly enjoyed laughing at these jokes, especially if you are a short person. Not only are they great anytime you want to tell a joke but if you keep some on hand for a tall person/short person joke dual, the short person will have definitely have a leg to stand on.

How to Slap Tall People

Comments

Tall kid on September 11, 2020:

I found theses funny, thank you for writing these out for our short friends. Yes they are offensive but people are just taking it the wrong way. Thank you again, and have a good laugh.

Tall Person on August 09, 2020:

I didn't even read the jokes. But just reading the comments just said it all!

Loxed on November 14, 2019:

This really hurts my feelings i was looking for something funny but this is not funny at all if i have to say something is that tall people are model brave and smart this is what i think

Arathi on November 03, 2019:

best joke is... How's tomorrows weather looking like from up there?

Ben Dover on October 22, 2019:

why waste your life writing this

Alyssa on October 08, 2019:

None of these are funny though. They only really call tall people ugly, dumb and useless, and there's nothing to do with their height. Well, there are a few things to do with height, but they're so exaggerated that they're not even worth a grin. I'm not being salty or anything because I am tall, because (as a joke) i make jokes about short people all the time, an sometimes I think its funny to search up what things people can come up with about tall people. But honestly, the point of tall people jokes is supposed to be about height, as intelligence, looks and usefulness have nothing to do with height. If i wanted to read jokes about them, i would search it up. So, if in the future you are going to make a joke about someone being tall, actually make it about them being tall. Bye have a great day

Abraham Lincoln on September 27, 2019:

I am offended.

This’ so mean.

xd

Marco Polo on September 15, 2019:

Not insulting at all

Zoey on August 03, 2019:

Wow Wtf these “jokes” aren’t even funny.

percy on May 24, 2019:

these are.. kinda mean? the most tall people ever say is “haha midget” this article just called all tall people stupid, ugly, useless and awkward.

ibrahim Mohammed on March 02, 2019:

mehn...if a short person tells me this joke, I'll hit him.

The hand gripping the chrome microphone on February 19, 2019:

Braahh ya can be smart but the short squad can go and fit anywhere else and wear most clothing, while ya tall people struggle to find stuff shorter than you

Very talll girl on February 11, 2019:

Im 6'2' and i think this were so funny and i was laughing so hard I was crying but don't tell any of these jokes to tall people cuz they will hit you if you're short and we are smart

aaron, sim, gio, chump, dino on November 29, 2018:

this was a blast to read big fan

Big Brodie on June 11, 2018:

@Shortstudent u gotta look at the sky and be like dayuummmm why I gotta do bend backwards to look at you I said that to a gurl in my klass and she almost kried but it was really funny errbody was laughing she ran out the room and bumped her head on the thing over the door

Frank Atanacio from Shelton on May 10, 2018:

some of these were actually pretty good...

Short student on April 16, 2018:

My teacher makes fun of me everyday for being short and none of these jokes are going to insult her

Ramit on March 22, 2018:

Funny

Guy who thinks 'these jokes are terrible' on March 10, 2018:

These jokes a terrible.

tall girl on January 20, 2018:

I constantly get called giraffe everyday (Also slenderman and other hurtful names like the green giant.)I don't think short people or just regular height people realize the hardships and "jokes" aka body shaming toward tall people that happens multiple times a day. If you are going to make jokes about tall people at least make them funny and witty and not dumb because these just sound like body shaming statements. Also, what tall person hurt your feelings to make you think all tall people are bad, dumb, awkward, mean people?

Sam on January 07, 2018:

Wth is wrong with you people. You guys dont have a sense of humor!! I was practically laughing my whole way through reading this and the person named 'Tall Guy' that is right below my comment, stuff the moon in your ass. This is very useful and i am going to write it down, if you people think that this is not good, then look in the mirror, oh wait.... it must have cracked.

Anyways, thanks for the joke tips! Sure am gonna use them.

Sam

tall guy on November 24, 2017:

sorry but these are not jokes and please never tell any of your friends cos you would be the cringe master after this... i was looking for tall jokes to roast myself and some friends but this is sad... these are not jokes they are insecure statements from a not so tall person. the point of a joke is to make fun of some one in a witty yet funny manner not saying that their clothes never fit... in that case short people go shopping in the kids section... lol if you gave one good joke even insulting i would laugh my ass off but this was just sad to read and honestly a waste of time. please do not be the person that tells these jokes to other people since your own reputation is at stake here.

so_bad on November 16, 2017:

these are not jokes... saying tall people are dumb doesn't make sense

Yypp on June 08, 2017:

Most of these don't even make sense? Like tall people don't need step ladders. Either way their gonna get roasted

Joyful Soul on February 05, 2017:

Sure jokes short and tall are all in good fun but implying that tall people are dumb and stupid is crossing the line. Since when is tall associated with automatically being stupid?.., wow Height, short or tall does not determine IQ. Calling anyone stupid is just a cruel insult and doesn't say much about the person saying it.

Harish Mamgain from New Delhi , India on January 26, 2015:

With a tall person at home, you won't need a ladder. You also don't need to come downstairs and can shake hands with a tall person while standing at your balcony. You don't need to turn your back if you want to avoid a tall person, you can walk straight just in front of him without ever being caught. The game 'hide and seek " is not for tall guys. With a tall friend, you can swim any far in the river for you will be at his hand when in danger.

My friend, I am a short man and have some very good friends who are tall. We enjoy making fun of one another without ever being offended. A person who can laugh loud lives a happy life. Jokes are meant for enriching our craze for life. I think, I have added a little bit more fun to your humorous list.

Paige on October 18, 2014:

Tall people jokes!