36 Funny Tall People Jokes

Updated on January 14, 2016

Short people say that God only lets people grow until they're perfect. Therefore, short people just didn't take as long as others to reach perfection (ahem, tall people).

Although you tall people may disagree with this assertion and crack a joke about short people in response, short people jokes are just too common and overused!

For a long time, short people have been the target of jokes because of their height, but let’s face it, tall people; the tall life isn’t all hunky dory, is it?

You are always hitting your head on things, stubbing those long toes of yours, and forget ever finding shoes that fit you in a normal store!

Every shirt you buy shrinks into a crop top after the first wash, and you're the reason high waters pants got their name!

So laugh it up, tall people, because we (short people) are ready to make a comeback.

To keep making fun of tall people, since they deserve it, here is a list of 36 jokes at the expense of our giraffe-like friends.

Time for Funnies

  • What do a tall wizard and a tall elf have in common? They both needed a short hobbit to save their butts.
  • Have you ever noticed that there is a garment called shorts? Because I can’t recall ever seeing a piece of clothing called talls.
  • Why were shorts invented? So tall people wouldn’t look like they’re always wearing capris.
  • What do you call a big and tall store? Unfortunate.
  • Where did the tall person find a boyfriend? At the top of a step ladder.
  • What’s the difference between a clown and a tall person? Their shoe store.
  • It's not tall people's fault they think they're the center of the universe. They just can't see anyone else.
  • What does a tall person do when they see an airplane coming? Duck.
  • What happened when the tall person wanted to hang himself? Nothing, he couldn't find a high enough ceiling.
  • How'd the tall person break into working at Wells Fargo? After 6 years of being an excellent coat rack, they decided to let her have her own desk.
  • Yo mama so tall she tripped on a rock and hit the moon.

  • What do tall people and Bode Miller have in common? They both look like they're wearing skis.
  • How do you make a tall person look more awkward? You can’t.
  • What do tall people and a lamp post have in common? Intelligence.
  • What does a tall person and a burnt out lightbulb have in common? They’re not that bright.
  • What do you call a tall, attractive person? An evolutionary miracle.
  • What do tall people and chopsticks have in common? They're awkward at the most inopportune moments.
  • What’s a tall person’s worst fear? Ceiling fans.

  • Yo mamma so tall she uses the Empire State Building as a toothpick.
  • Do you know why most supermodels are really tall? Because if they can look good in the outfit, anyone can.
  • Do you know what Victoria’s Secret actually is? She likes short guys.
  • How many tall people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2. One to get a chair and the other one to call a short person for help.
  • What did the tall person say to the short person? What?
  • What's the most popular sport for tall women? Wrestling each other over men who are taller than them.

  • The other day I Googled “tall people." Funny thing was, Google only showed results for “dumb people.”
  • Tall people: the giraffes of the human race since the beginning of time.
  • Tall people look like slinkies when they run.
  • Tall people are only good for two things: Laughing at them, and getting things from the top shelf.
  • Every time a tall person bumps their head, somewhere a short person is smiling.
  • What's the difference between a tall person and a broom? A broom is useful.
  • Tall people: where the family will meet if someone gets lost in a crowd.
  • Where do tall people find significant others? Out back behind the big and tall store, weeping.
  • How do you make a tall person angry? Pick them up in a smart car.
  • Yo mama so tall that when I told her to take one step back she went to the other side of the world.
  • What’s the difference between a 5 foot-tall person and a 6-foot-tall person? One person has an extra foot of height, and the other has a brain.
  • Inside every short man is a tall man doubled over in pain.

What's the worst thing about being tall?

See results

A Couple More From the Comments

  • With a tall person at home, you won't ever need a ladder.
  • A big benefit of tall people is that you don't need to come downstairs to shake their hand. You can do it right from the balcony.
  • You don't need to turn your back if you want to avoid a tall person. You can walk straight just in front of him without ever being caught.
  • With a tall friend, you can swim as far as you want in the river for you will be at his hand when in danger.

It's Just a Joke!

See, tall people jokes are just as funny as short people jokes, if not more! If you are a short person telling these jokes, take note of all of the tall people just kinda awkwardly standing there, perhaps letting out a nervous laugh to try to fit in, even though they can’t fit into their own clothes.

Just let it soak in, and embrace the moment since for once you are not the target of cruel height jokes!

I’m sure you’ve thoroughly enjoyed laughing at these jokes, especially if you are a short person. Not only are they great anytime you want to tell a joke but if you keep some on hand for a tall person/short person joke dual, the short person will have definitely have a leg to stand on.

How to Slap Tall People

Questions & Answers

    Comments

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      • profile image

        Big Brodie 

        4 months ago

        @Shortstudent u gotta look at the sky and be like dayuummmm why I gotta do bend backwards to look at you I said that to a gurl in my klass and she almost kried but it was really funny errbody was laughing she ran out the room and bumped her head on the thing over the door

      • Frank Atanacio profile image

        Frank Atanacio 

        5 months ago from Shelton

        some of these were actually pretty good...

      • profile image

        Short student 

        6 months ago

        My teacher makes fun of me everyday for being short and none of these jokes are going to insult her

      • profile image

        Ramit 

        7 months ago

        Funny

      • profile image

        Guy who thinks 'these jokes are terrible' 

        7 months ago

        These jokes a terrible.

      • profile image

        tall girl 

        9 months ago

        I constantly get called giraffe everyday (Also slenderman and other hurtful names like the green giant.)I don't think short people or just regular height people realize the hardships and "jokes" aka body shaming toward tall people that happens multiple times a day. If you are going to make jokes about tall people at least make them funny and witty and not dumb because these just sound like body shaming statements. Also, what tall person hurt your feelings to make you think all tall people are bad, dumb, awkward, mean people?

      • profile image

        Sam 

        9 months ago

        Wth is wrong with you people. You guys dont have a sense of humor!! I was practically laughing my whole way through reading this and the person named 'Tall Guy' that is right below my comment, stuff the moon in your ass. This is very useful and i am going to write it down, if you people think that this is not good, then look in the mirror, oh wait.... it must have cracked.

        Anyways, thanks for the joke tips! Sure am gonna use them.

        Sam

      • profile image

        tall guy 

        11 months ago

        sorry but these are not jokes and please never tell any of your friends cos you would be the cringe master after this... i was looking for tall jokes to roast myself and some friends but this is sad... these are not jokes they are insecure statements from a not so tall person. the point of a joke is to make fun of some one in a witty yet funny manner not saying that their clothes never fit... in that case short people go shopping in the kids section... lol if you gave one good joke even insulting i would laugh my ass off but this was just sad to read and honestly a waste of time. please do not be the person that tells these jokes to other people since your own reputation is at stake here.

      • profile image

        so_bad 

        11 months ago

        these are not jokes... saying tall people are dumb doesn't make sense

      • profile image

        Yypp 

        16 months ago

        Most of these don't even make sense? Like tall people don't need step ladders. Either way their gonna get roasted

      • profile image

        Joyful Soul 

        20 months ago

        Sure jokes short and tall are all in good fun but implying that tall people are dumb and stupid is crossing the line. Since when is tall associated with automatically being stupid?.., wow Height, short or tall does not determine IQ. Calling anyone stupid is just a cruel insult and doesn't say much about the person saying it.

      • Harishprasad profile image

        Harish Mamgain 

        3 years ago from New Delhi , India

        With a tall person at home, you won't need a ladder. You also don't need to come downstairs and can shake hands with a tall person while standing at your balcony. You don't need to turn your back if you want to avoid a tall person, you can walk straight just in front of him without ever being caught. The game 'hide and seek " is not for tall guys. With a tall friend, you can swim any far in the river for you will be at his hand when in danger.

        My friend, I am a short man and have some very good friends who are tall. We enjoy making fun of one another without ever being offended. A person who can laugh loud lives a happy life. Jokes are meant for enriching our craze for life. I think, I have added a little bit more fun to your humorous list.

      • profile image

        Paige 

        4 years ago

        Tall people jokes!

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