15 Funny Jokes About Einstein and Relativity
Let me tell you what I look like
Albert Einstein at a Glance
Who is Albert Einstein? Most people know him as a super genius: the most brilliant scientist who ever lived. Albert Einstein (1879-1955) was a German-American physicist who won the Nobel Prize for Physics in 1921. He was a mathematics professor at the Institute for Advanced Study at Princeton.
He is best known for his mass–energy equivalence equation (E=mc2) and famous relativity theory. He also had a great sense of humor, and was famously caught on camera sticking out his tongue. In wider culture, the name "Einstein" has become synonymous with genius.
Funny and Naughty Childhood
Einstein was not considered a smart student when he was a kid. He was actually unable to speak fluently until he was 12 years old. He was a naughty boy with unruly hair. His troublesome behavior in class and out earned him the nickname, “Rotterdam Rotter.”
Out of school, he became a celebrated musician and slapstick comedian. But his incorrigible Kleptomania, (he stole his friends' stuff) got him kicked out of entertainment. Eventually, he returned to academics and soon showed his intelligence.
Einstein Loved Jokes
Albert Einstein had a well-known sense of humor and sometimes taunted his teachers and, later, his fellow scientists. He was particularly smart with words. Einstein was able to explain difficult concepts with simple illustrations, and often added humor as well. He made hundreds of jokes and funny quotes about many topics.
Jokes on Relativity
1. Relativity Friend
Einstein walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'll take a beer, and a beer for my friend, Heisenberg."
The bartender looks around and asks, "Is your friend here?"
"Well," says Einstein, "he is and he isn't."
2. Second Greatest Contribution
Einstein's second greatest contribution: he said that when he was cooking soup and also wanted a soft-boiled egg, he would add the egg to the soup and thereby have one less pot to wash.
3. Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
A six-year-old boy spotted Albert Einstein walking down the street and decided to try out his favorite joke on him. "Mr. Einstein! Why did the chicken cross the road?"
To which the famous physicist replied, "My young burgeoning mind, zee question does not have a definite anzer. Vether zee chicken crossed zee road or zee road crossed zee chicken depends on your frame of reference."
Einstein Funny Face
4. Einstein's Vacation to Mexico
Albert Einstein had just about finished his work on the theory of special relativity when he decided to take a break and go on vacation to Mexico. So he hopped on a plane and headed to Acapulco. Each day, late in the afternoon, sporting dark sunglasses, he walked in the white Mexican sand and breathed in the fresh Pacific sea air.
On the last day, he paused during his stroll to sit down on a bench and watch the sunset. When the large orange ball was just disappearing, a last beam of light seemed to radiate toward him. The event brought him back to thinking about his physics work. "What symbol should I use for the speed of light?" he asked himself. The problem was that nearly every Greek letter had been taken for some other purpose.
Just then, a beautiful Mexican woman passed by. Albert Einstein just had to say something to her. Almost out of desperation, he asked as he lowered his dark sunglasses, "Do you not zink zat zee speed of light is very fast?" The woman smiled at Einstein (which, by the way, made his heart sink) and replied, "Si." And now you know the rest of the story. (Explanation: the symbol for the speed of light is c).
Jokes on Absent-mindedness
5. Einstein Lost His Ticket
Einstein was once traveling from Princeton on a train when the conductor came down the aisle, punching the tickets of every passenger. When he came to Einstein, Einstein reached in his vest pocket. He couldn't find his ticket, so he reached in his trouser pockets. It wasn't there, so he looked in his briefcase but couldn't find it. Then he looked in the seat beside him. He still couldn't find it.
The conductor said, "Dr. Einstein, I know who you are. We all know who you are. I'm sure you bought a ticket. Don't worry about it."
Einstein nodded appreciatively. The conductor continued down the aisle punching tickets. As he was ready to move to the next car, he turned around and saw the great physicist down on his hands and knees looking under his seat for his ticket.
The conductor rushed back and said, "Dr. Einstein, Dr. Einstein, don't worry, I know who you are. No problem. You don't need a ticket. I'm sure you bought one."
Einstein looked at him and said, "Young man, I too, know who I am. What I don't know is where I'm going."
6. Einstein on a Train
A student recognizes Einstein in a train and asks, “Excuse me, professor, but does New York stop by this train?” There also a similar story in which Einstein himself asks the conductor, "Excuse me, does New York stop by this train?"
7. I'm not Sure
Albert Einstein and Werner Heisenberg were out walking in the country conversing at length on the subject of physics.
After some time, Einstein said, "Werner, stop a minute."
Both men stopped walking and Heisenberg asked, "What is it, Albert?" "
Einstein responded, "I have been so immersed in thought that I have not been paying attention. Where are we?"
Heisenberg replied, "I'm not sure."
Jokes about Einstein as Lecturer
8. Einstein’s Chauffeur
This is a true-life anecdote about Albert Einstein and his theory of relativity. After having propounded his famous theory, Albert Einstein would tour the various Universities in the United States, delivering lectures wherever he went. He was always accompanied by his faithful chauffeur (driver), Harry, who would attend each of these lectures while seated in the back row.
One fine day, after Einstein had finished a lecture and was coming out of the auditorium into his vehicle, Harry addressed him. He said, “Professor Einstein, I’ve heard your lecture on Relativity so many times that if I were ever given the opportunity, I would be able to deliver it to perfection myself!”
“Very well,” replied Einstein, “I’m going to Dartmouth next week. They don’t know me there. You can deliver the lecture as Einstein, and I’ll take your place as Harry!” And so it went to be. Harry delivered the lecture without a word out of place while Einstein sat in the back row playing “chauffeur” and enjoying a snooze for a change.
Just as Harry was descending from the podium, however, one of the research assistants intercepted him and began to ask him a question on the theory of relativity, one that involved a lot of complex calculations and equations.
Harry replied to the assistant, “The answer to this question is very simple! In fact, it’s so simple that I’m going to let my chauffeur answer it!”
9. Exam Questions
In the period when Einstein was active as a professor, one of his students once came to him and said, "The questions of this year's exam are the same as last year!"
"True," Einstein said, "but this year all the answers are different."
10. Worth Teaching
Einstein once said that it would be hard to teach in a co-ed college since guys would only look at the girls and not listen to the teacher. His students objected that they would listen to him very attentively, forgetting about any girls. "But such guys won't be worth teaching," replied the great man.
11. Wrong Words
Einstein was talking to one of his colleagues about quantum mechanics. The colleague kept using classical terms to discuss the quantum phenomena.
Einstein finally said (something to the effect), "I can't be sure that I understand you because you are using the wrong words."
Confusing Einstein Jokes
12. Einstein's Profession
In response to a fellow train passenger on October 31, 1930, who asked him his occupation, Einstein answered that he was an artist's model, reflecting Einstein's feeling that he was constantly posing for sculptures and paintings.
13. Understanding Relativity
Einstein's favorite story concerned himself. In a certain debating society, the subject of relativity came up, and one member took it upon himself to elucidate the all-absorbing scientific theory. He explained, propounded and examined the subject for an hour. When he had finished, from sheer exhaustion, a listener spoke up.
“You know, after listening to you, I think you are really greater than Einstein himself. According to statistics, only twelve men in the whole world understand Einstein, but nobody understands you.”
14. At the Barber
Einstein went to the barber for a haircut. As he waited, the physicist contemplated a complex mathematical formula.
When Einstein's turn came, the barber asked the scientist to remove his hat. “Sorry,” Einstein mused, “I didn't know ladies were present.”
15. Charlie Chaplin and Albert Einstein
Charlie Chaplin had invited Albert Einstein to the premiere of City Lights. When the public cheered them both, Chaplin remarked, "They cheer me because they all understand me, and they cheer you because no one understands you.”