Retired counselor, 341 short stories published by FSU. I have 4 sons, love sharing photography, writing, love travel, sunshine, sea & Grace.
Years ago, I worked as a stewardess on the old Viscount Propeller airplanes. It was great fun, but we had many hair-raising experiences. One of the more humorous was the day we flew to Orly, Paris to pick up French passengers and bring them to London.
We ‘deadheaded’ the night before (this means we flew over without passengers). The next day was very hot and the plane had been sat on the tarmac for hours. The cabin crew consisted of me acting as Senior Stewardess, Chantal, the other Stewardess, the Captain and First Officer.
We boarded the aircraft thirty minutes before the passengers. (This was regulation, to ensure the cabin was clean, complete paperwork and upload supplies). As a stewardess working on the old Viscounts, we had to operate a switch (located in the galley at the back of the plane) which puts the cabin temperature into “intercool.” This means the cabin cools down once the engines get going.
Eventually we began boarding the passengers. I was so glad I was working with Chantal that day who could speak much better French than I; she was from Geneva and so spoke perfect French. One by one the passengers took their seats and began to complain about the heat. Chantal did a P.A. explaining that it would cool down as soon as the engines were running and went through the announcements and safety procedures in French. We took our seats as the plane taxied out to the runway and waited for our turn to take off.
The plane sped down the runway and we were airborne. After a few minutes we realized the temperature in the cabin wasn’t changing. Chantal and I removed our seat belts and went to the back of the aircraft to check the switch was in ‘intercool.’ It was, but nothing was happening and it was much more bumpy than usual, and we had to hold on. We didn’t appear to be lifting out of the cumulus clouds. Then, we got the call every stewardess dreads. The “crew call.” In our case this meant a blue light flashed over the flight deck cabin telling me that I had to go forward and speak to the captain. I knew something was wrong. My legs felt weak as I passed passengers who were complaining and fanning themselves with the safety literature.
The captain explained that the flaps were ‘tech’ (stuck). After taking this information in, I realized we would be okay. Luckily, the old Viscount aircraft have a manual override for virtually everything. He explained that the first officer would come back and manually override the switch and move the flaps. My job was to roll back the carpet in the center isle so we could get access to the hatch.
Okay, I thought, how am I going to explain this one to the passengers? It was very bumpy and I had to hold onto the tops of the seats as I weaved my way back to a white-faced Chantal. I thought about how the passengers would feel watching us roll back the center carpet. Then suddenly I had an idea and ran it by the Captain who gave it the okay. I got Chantal to do a P.A. (in French) and explain that due to the heat in the cabin, the First Officer was going to come back and let in some fresh air to cool them down. (which of course, is impossible). We told them that we would lift the center carpet and then safely let in some cold air. There was a round of applause and “merci, merci!” We rolled the carpet back which exposed a large hatch in the center. In the hold at the back was a rather large metal gadget approximately 5ft high, which looked a bit like a giant sardine can opener. This slotted neatly into a hole in the hatch. The first officer started turning the device and the passengers applauded him. My job was to look discreetly out of the window and give him the thumbs up when I saw the flaps move.
Needless to say, it worked. After just a few turns of the manual override it kick-started the automatic flap switch on the flight deck and we had no further problems. The passengers thought we were wonderful and had no idea of the dilemma we had been in. We laughed until we cried, relaying our story to the rest of the crew back home.
Helen Lewis 2009
© 2009 Helen Lewis
Helen Lewis (author) from Florida on October 18, 2010:
Now there's a term I haven't heard in a long time..Pillock!
attemptedhumour from Australia on October 18, 2010:
Great come back in the 'git' department and i also used a 'queue' in one of the jokes, expecting people to understand. Pillock.
Helen Lewis (author) from Florida on October 17, 2010:
Hi attempted (achieves) humour... thank you for your kind comments. Your daughter is following her dream and as you say, will get work. I have two sons at Uni with no guarantee of work afterward so I agree with you - and agreed, who knows what the future holds - I wish them all well. Thanks so much for stopping by...
No, I bet they don't know what a git is over here - despite the fact that there are quite a few LOL!
attemptedhumour from Australia on October 17, 2010:
PS i'll bet they don't have gits in the US.
attemptedhumour from Australia on October 17, 2010:
That's a brilliant piece of lateral thinking and a very funny well written hub. My youngest daughter is in the last week of her training as a stewardess, something she has wanted to do since she was about twelve. A friend of a friend asked about my two daughters yesterday when i said my youngest was training to be a stewardess she said. "Why would she want to do that?"
I replied that she loved flying, wanted to travel and didn't want to spend four years and thousands of dollars getting a degree that might not get her a job. Stuck up git! I'm not against Uni as my older daughter is about to finish her arts degree. It's just horses for courses. Who knows where either of them will be as their life unfolds. Cheers again.
Helen Lewis (author) from Florida on December 26, 2009:
Thanks again fastfreta!
Alfreta Sailor from Southern California on December 26, 2009:
Another cute and interesting adventure. You seem to have a million of them, I look forward to reading more.
Helen Lewis (author) from Florida on December 21, 2009:
Thanks Peter - we had a lot of fun and a lot of 'hair-raising' moments!
petermdhart from Cornwall, UK on December 21, 2009:
Hilarious! Well done..