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You Know You Are Getting Old When…: Aging Facts and Jokes

Inspirational essays and articles, with a touch of humor, are a favorite topic for Ms. Giordano, a writer and public speaker.

We know when an ancient redwood is old because we can count the rings.

We know when an ancient redwood is old because we can count the rings.

What Are the Statistics About the World’s Aging Population?

Statistics show us that the world’s population is aging. Getting old is not so bad considering the alternative, so let's take a humorous look at aging. But first a few statistics about aging.

The population of almost every country in the world is aging. The aging of the population is occurring due to increases in longevity and declining birth rates.

The country with the highest proportion of older per people (aged 65+) is Japan. The country with the lowest elderly population is United Arab Emirates.

Population 65+ in Various Countries (2016)

Country% of population 65+

Japan

27

United Kingdom

18

Canada

17

United States

15

Australia

15

China

10

India

6

United Arab Emirates

1

Population 65+ in the United States (By Date)

DateNumber of People Age 65+Percent of People Age 65+

1950

12 million

8.1

2000

35 million

12.8

2010

40 million

13.3

2020

53 million

16.4

2050

80 million

20.4

How Old Are the Baby Boomers?

In the United States, we have a group known as the baby boomers, people born in the years immediately after World War II from 1946 to 1964. This group accounts for a little more than a third (35%) of the U.S. population. The oldest of the baby-boomers turned 65 in 2011.

What Is the Definition of “Old”?

You have probably heard the expression "You are only as old as you feel." Regardless, in the United States, 65 is the unofficial age of “old” since it is the age when people traditionally retire. (Since the age of receiving Social Security has gone up to 67, perhaps that will be the new official age of old.)

Demographers often divide the older population into three stages.

  • The “young old” are aged 65 to 74. This group is nicknamed the “go-go years.” People in this group tend to be active and often do a lot of traveling.
  • The “middle old” is aged 75 to 84. This group is sometimes called the “slow-go years.” People in this group have become less active.
  • The “old-old” group is aged 85 and older. This group is referred to as the "no-go years” because people in this age group are the least likely to be active. There are currently six million people in this age group and is the fastest growing age group.

In the developed world, people who are age 65 can expect to live on average for 18 more years. That’s a lot of years of being old.

Of course, age is just a number. Some people are physically and/or mentally younger than their years and some are older. So how can you tell when you are getting old? Allow me to help with the following lists of signs of old age.

You Might Be Old If You Remember ...

  • Penny candy
  • Candy cigarettes
  • Soda machines that dispensed glass bottles
  • Diners with tableside juke boxes
  • Metal ice cube trays with levers
  • Party line telephones
  • Telephone numbers with a word prefix (Butterfield 8)
  • Newsreels before the movie
  • 33 RPM records
  • Reel-to-reel tape recorders
  • Green stamps
  • Roller skate keys
  • Hula hoops
  • Washtub wringers
  • The Fuller Brush man
  • 35-cent a gallon gasoline
  • 15-cent McDonald hamburgers with 10-cent fries
  • 5-cent packs of baseball cards with that slab of pink bubblegum

You Know You Are Getting Old When… You Notice These Physical Changes.

Aging is accompanied by a lot of physical changes. It’s not fair.You finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.

You know you are getting old if …

  • It takes two tries to get up from the couch.
  • It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.
  • It takes twice as long to look half as good.
  • Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work.
  • You give up all your bad habits and still don't feel good.
  • You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.
  • Rocking in a rocking chair feels like a roller coaster ride.
  • Your knees buckle, and your belt won't.
  • You have that “morning after” feeling when you wake up, but you didn’t party the night before.
Your rocking chair feels like a roller coaster.

Your rocking chair feels like a roller coaster.

You Know You Are Getting Old When… You Notice These Changes in Your Attitudes and Behaviors.

You might be getting old if you are now the age you used to think was old, but now it doesn’t seem so old anymore. People over 50 always think that old age is ten years older than they are now. There are some other attitude changes as well.

You know you are getting old if …

  • You have more patience, but actually it's just that you don't care anymore.
  • You confuse having a clear conscience with a bad memory.
  • You sing along with the elevator music.
  • You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
  • Work is a lot of fun, and fun is a lot of work.
  • You stop searching for the meaning of life to focus on searching for your car keys.
  • You speed on the highway so you can reach your destination before you forget where you’re going.

You Know You Are Getting Old When… You Notice These Changes in Other People.

Have you had this feeling when you look at the people you have known for a long time and you notice that they are looking old—how did they get older when I haven’t gotten any older?

You know you are getting old if …

  • People call at 9 p.m. and ask, "Did I wake you?"
  • Your children begin to look middle aged.
  • Your friends marry and divorce instead of “make-out” and “break up.”
  • Your address book has mostly names that start with Dr.
  • The pharmacist has become your new best friend.
  • The president is younger than you. So are your doctors.
  • You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.

You Know You Are Getting Old When… You Notice These Changes in Your Social Llife.

You know you are getting old if you look back on the times you partied all night and still got up and went to work the next morning and you wonder how you ever did it. Old age brings a lot of changes to your social life.

You know you are getting old if …

  • Your idea of a night out is sitting on the patio.
  • When you go out your energy runs out before your money does.
  • You look forward to a dull evening.
  • You get two invitations to go out on the same night, and you pick the one that gets you home the earliest.
  • Happy hour is a nap.
  • You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.
  • You’re the one calling the police because those kids next door are having a loud party.

You Know You Are Getting Old When… You Notice These Changes in Your Sex Life.

Of course, geriatric sex is nothing like the sex of your youth. But it can still be great sex. (Check out this award-winning book, Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud About Senior Sex if you don't believe it.) Don't let these stupid jokes make you feel otherwise.

You know you are getting old if …

  • You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
  • You turn out the lights for economic, rather than romantic, reasons.
  • Getting lucky means you found your car in the parking lot.
  • The twinkle in your eye is only a reflection from the sun on your bifocals.
  • Your wild oats have turned into bran flakes.

You Know You Are Getting Old When… You Notice You Don’t Understand What Your Grandkids Are Talking About.

You might be getting old if it seems like your grand kids are talking a foreign language and words don’t mean what they used to mean anymore.

You know you are getting old if …

  • You think a "vine" is something that grows in the garden.
  • You think “hooking up” is a knitting technique.
  • You think being "gay" means being happy.

And Finally, You Know You Are Getting Old When ...

... the candles on your birthday cake cost more than the cake.

The birthday cake has a lot of candles, even when each candle represents a decade. instead of a year.

The birthday cake has a lot of candles, even when each candle represents a decade. instead of a year.

© 2015 Catherine Giordano

I welcome your comments. Are you old? How do you know?

Peter on January 17, 2020:

Not to be picky ( and I don’t believe I know this) but here goes regarding McDonald’s: burgers were .15; cheese burgers were .20; French fries were .12; drink was .10. Nothing else was on the menu!

Don on August 02, 2019:

Congratulations. You're young. I remember two for a penny candies.

Don on August 02, 2019:

You know you're old when your drug of choice is aleve.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on August 26, 2018:

Good for you! Keep on laughing!

nan on August 26, 2018:

i am 66 and i can out-walk most 20 year olds. i won't let a little thing like age slow me down! thanks for the laughs, i will share with the few people i know who are still alive! i am so old i still write "ha-ha" instead of LOL. I thought wtf meant wed, thu, fri. i could go on and on, but my 5-hour energy ran out 2 hours ago!

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on April 19, 2017:

Greensleeves Hubs: We all get old. We can't stop it, but we can laugh at it and keep our thinking young. We don't need Trump as president in order to feel young. Think about it--if you are not yet 65 most of the candidates for president in recent years were older than you. Hillary for instance was 69. John Kerry wa older than you when he ran. McCain too.

Greensleeves Hubs from Essex, UK on April 18, 2017:

Thanks for a funny article Catherine. I did not recognise many of the one-liners, even though I once wrote a quotation hub on a similar topic - it just goes to show how many elements there are to getting older. It seems old age turns us into an entirely different species!

As someone who is too rapidly approaching that 'old age is 65' definition, it is all rather depressing for me, though I do take heart from the suggestion that being old is when 'the president is younger than you are.' At last I've found a reason to celebrate the election of Mr Trump! - may he remain president for the next 20 years. That will mean that I remain young for 20 more years :) Alun

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on December 06, 2015:

Helga Silva: The senior years can be the best years of one's life. Thanks for your comment.

Helga Silva from USA on December 06, 2015:

Very nice hub and really funny. I don't mind getting old, there is a beauty about all stages in our life.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on July 24, 2015:

Rueben Blanca Espana: It was so nice of you to let me know that you liked my jokes and remarks about getting. Thanks.

Ruben Blanca Espana on July 24, 2015:

True and funny. Interesting.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on June 23, 2015:

Chriswillman90: I'm so glad my hub got you laughing. Thanks for commenting.

Krzysztof Willman from Parlin, New Jersey on June 23, 2015:

This is so funny, well done, and everybody should be reading this because age doesn't have to define you. It's okay to poke fun at yourself because life is short and shouldn't be taken so seriously all the time.

As far as feeling old, I feel really old when I name a well known movie or person (in my generation) and someone younger than me is completely clueless about it.

Stephanie Henkel from USA on May 25, 2015:

I've tried to fight it, but to no avail...I know I'm old because I remember everything on your list! The funny thing is that my friends look so much older than I do! Thanks for the laugh. It is a fun read!

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on May 25, 2015:

Thelma Alberts: Today I am feeling glad about being old because of comments like yours. I wouldn't have written this if I wasn't old and then I wouldn't have gotten all these nice comments and shares. Stay in good health and you can be in the "young-old" category when you are 105. .

Thelma Alberts from Germany and Philippines on May 25, 2015:

Thanks for making me laugh today. I still need a decade to be officially "young old". LOL! I have already some signs but I fight against them;-))) Sharing this awesome funny hub in my fb account. Voted up and more. Take care Catherine.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on May 25, 2015:

fpherj48: You have made my day with your comment. I love what you said "After 40 time stands still." It does. I look at the kids I know and think, "How did they get so much older when I haven't gotten any older." LOL. Thanks so much for your enthusiastic sharing. I'm glad I gave you a laugh today.

Suzie from Carson City on May 25, 2015:

Catherine.....I absolutely LOVE this. It's hilarious and oh-so-true! The very best thing about this is....if we can laugh at it all and accept the inevitable with grace.....the truth is we're Young-at-heart. Hang on tight and don't change a thing.

I've memorized the mantra, "60+ is the new 40+".....and I've added a little twist to that. "After 40+ TIME STANDS STILL. I believe we all deserve our own fantasy...LOL....Thanks for the chuckle. Up FUNNY shared pinned Tweeted.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on May 25, 2015:

Mary615: What can we do about aging except laugh. Laughing keeps you young, and now that you mention it so does HubPages. It is good exercise for the brain and lots of social interaction via comments. Plus I think of HP as my legacy. Maybe people will still be reading my stuff after I am gone. Congrats on the great grandkids. thanks for the comment, praise, and share. There is no grater compliment than a share to your own social media.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on May 25, 2015:

bedigiulio: The compensation of getting old--wisdom. You would probably like my hub "Embracing My Inner Crone." It's about a woman, but you can probably relate. Thank you for commenting.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on May 25, 2015:

rebeccamealey: Do you remember red wax lips. Thanks for the comment. A trip down memory lane is always fun. I hope it made you smile. I try to smile a lot to counteract the tendency of the lips to turn downward with age. Did your mother ever say, "don't make faces or your face will get stuck like that." Maybe my face can get stuck with a smile.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on May 25, 2015:

Paul Kuehn: Thank you so very much for your comment, praise and share. What can we do about aging except laugh? I'm glad I made you laugh.

Mary Hyatt from Florida on May 25, 2015:

I call Florida "God's waiting room"! This was such a fun read, and I can certainly identify with everything you wrote. I am expecting two new Great Grandchildren just any day, so that should tell you I am older than God!!

I don't mind getting older, though, as long as everything works!

I credit HubPages and my Min. Schnauzer for keeping me young and alert!

Thanks for the wonderful chuckle today.

Voted this UP , shared here and on Google+

Bill De Giulio from Massachusetts on May 25, 2015:

Hi Catherine. Great hub, very funny and also very accurate. As a mid-fifty something this one hit home. Sadly I remember most of the things in the list. But, on the bright side I am not only older but perhaps a little wiser. Have a great holiday.

Rebecca Mealey from Northeastern Georgia, USA on May 25, 2015:

Very good hub, combining humor with facts! I love the box of things remembered. I'd forgotten about candy cigarettes.

Paul Richard Kuehn from Udorn City, Thailand on May 25, 2015:

This is an awesome hub and I thank you for pointing it out to me. I like the humorous approach and I couldn't stop laughing. I guess I was too serious in my related hub. Yeah, I haven't noticed how I am physically aging until I start looking at earlier pictures of myself and pictures of my classmates as they look today. Voted up and sharing with HP followers.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on May 24, 2015:

Thanks DzyMsLizzy. I wish I had thought of "recycled teenager." Age is just a state of mind. And it is a fact that laugher adds years to your life and life to your years. So keep laughing and let's celebrate our 100th birthdays together.

Liz Elias from Oakley, CA on May 24, 2015:

Hahaha! This was great, and boy, can I relate! (See--when I make rhymes, it's by accident and not design. LOL)

I'm a baby-boomer in the "young-old" category, according to your chart. I remember vividly most of the things in your sidebar list, except I wasn't paying any attention to the price of gas in my young years, and my mother's washer wasn't a wringer type--though there was an old-fashioned stand-alone wringer kicking around in the garage.

I've always had the philosophy that "age is just a state of mind," and I've always been pretty active and fun-loving. My husband is actually 9 years younger than I, but he's had more health problems, so physically, he's "older." He has a t-shirt that reads, "I'm not old: I'm a recycled teenager!"

Voted up and funny.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on May 02, 2015:

OK. Now I understand. Eavesdropping was great entertainment, back in the days of party lines. I was only a young child when my family had a party line.

Julie K Henderson on May 02, 2015:

I'm told my dad and his brothers would listen to these girls talk to their boyfriends on the party line because they found it hilarious. My Grandma mentioned there was a lot of dramatic sighing in these conversations.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on May 02, 2015:

Thanks Julie K Henderson. It was not a good idea to be talking to your boyfriends on a party line. It was a 2-party line or 3-party line and that meant that three households share a telephone line. Those other parties could pick up the phone and hear your conversation. Just like the NSA today. Glad you enjoyed the hub.

Julie K Henderson on May 01, 2015:

This is a fun, informative hub. I've heard my Grandma talk about the party lines they used to have, and how the neighbor girls spent a lot of time talking to boys on this line. Voted up.

Kristen Howe from Northeast Ohio on April 30, 2015:

Anytime Catherine. My pleasure. It made me smile.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on April 30, 2015:

Kristen Howe: I'm glad you enjoyed my humorous tidbits on aging. I laugh every time I reread this hub. What's really funny is people tell me "that one is me. That's what I doo, how I feel, etc." Thanks for your comment.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on April 30, 2015:

lbrummer: Your comment was so great. You made me laugh. You are so right about what the biggest benefit of aging is. Thanks for your comment.

Kristen Howe from Northeast Ohio on April 30, 2015:

Catherine, this was a great hub with humorous tidbits about aging and the signs of it. It made me laugh and put a smile on my face. Voted up for funny!

Loraine Brummer from Hartington, Nebraska on April 14, 2015:

I love your article. What an eye opener. Up til now, I've been so proud of myself for becoming more patient with age. But, you've made me see that clearly what has happened is that I just don't care anymore. I find I no longer want to debate politics, religion, or anything else. My motto has become, "live and let live."

When I was younger I feared what old age would bring, but now I'm liking the fact that aging isn't as scary as I had feared. There are even some pretty amazing perks. (I'd list them if I could be bothered.)

Thanks for some good laughs and giggles, Catherine.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 20, 2015:

tobusiness: If we are lucky, we get old--some sooner than others. Laughter keeps us young at heart and as many physical benefits also. I'm glad I could make you laugh today. Life is good. Enjoy.

Jo Alexis-Hagues from Lincolnshire, U.K on March 20, 2015:

This will resonate with many of us baby-boomers. I love the sense of fun that flows through this awesome hub. For me, time has become the enemy, life have gone into fast forward, and it definitely takes me twice as long to look half as good. :) And I'm not even officially old yet. A fun but informative read.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 19, 2015:

PAINTDRIPS: I used the picture of the tree rings as metaphor for getting older, but I never thought of it the way your family does. It sounds like your family knows how to laugh about getting older. Your comment made me laugh.

Denise McGill from Fresno CA on March 19, 2015:

Maybe you should!! Around my family we always say we have gotten another ring around our trunk instead of saying we had another birthday... because we all tend to get a little wider in the girth each birthday anyway... the implication being if you cut us in half and counted the rings you would know our ages. haha.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 19, 2015:

Glad you enjoyed it PAITDRIPS. I laugh every time I see it again. maybe I should do a sequel. Thanks for the comment.

Denise McGill from Fresno CA on March 18, 2015:

So funny, thanks for the laugh. I resemble that way too much.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 13, 2015:

I have to add one more thing to my list. This one is true. You know you're getting old when you have to subtract the current year from the year of your birth to make sure of your age because you can't believe how old you are.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 07, 2015:

travmaj: Yes this old-age thing just sneaks up on us. The humor is the last to go. At least I hope so. But hey. Who's old? Not me. Not you either. Thanks for your comment.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 07, 2015:

Annuity Direct: It's is so nice of you to let me know that you found my hub fun. I had a few laughs myself as I wrote it. Thanks for reading and for your comment.

Anne Morrison on March 06, 2015:

Oh what a fun read! So many things you mentioned that I can relate to. Great hub and thanks!

travmaj from australia on March 06, 2015:

I have to admit it - I identified with most of this, of course I'm still wondering how ageing happened to me! I swear no-one warned me, it just seemed to happen.

No in an awful hurry to tick off the bucket list. Happy to say the humour remains intact and I had a fun time reading your lists and reminiscing - good to know I'm not alone. Thank you.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 03, 2015:

Thanks for your comment Mel: My phone number as a young teen was Astoria 8 followed by 4 numbers I no longer remember. When I dialed it, I dialed A-S-8 and then the last 4 numbers. The "Butterfield-8" I used as an example was the name of a novel by John O'Hara. If you knew that, it's another sign you might be old.

Mel Carriere from San Diego California on March 02, 2015:

I remembered all those things except the word prefix on the phone number. I'm not quite the Happy Days generation. Great hub!

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 02, 2015:

cam8510: I'm glad I made you laugh because your comment made me laugh.

Chris Mills from Traverse City, MI on March 02, 2015:

Very funny and all too true. Thanks for the fun read. Now I need a nap.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 02, 2015:

Sunshine: If you are not old now, you will be one day. Thanks for letting me know that you fund these one-liners type jokes hilarious. I laughed as I wrote this.

Linda Bilyeu from Orlando, FL on March 02, 2015:

It's official...I'm old. Well, kind of...not totally! Hilarious hub! :)

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 01, 2015:

Thanks AliciaC. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Linda Crampton from British Columbia, Canada on March 01, 2015:

This is an interesting and very amusing hub, Catherine! Thank you for the entertainment.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 01, 2015:

MsDora: Grateful is exactly the right feeling and it is my feeling too. But I'm glad we could share a laugh about the foibles of aging. Thank you for your comment.

Dora Weithers from The Caribbean on March 01, 2015:

When my tech ability is not up to par, I feel old; other than that l feel privileged. Always I feel grateful especially when I can enjoy humor like you shared. Thanks!

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 01, 2015:

Susan: I'm glad you got a chuckle from reading this. It was fun to write. Thanks for ocomment.

Susan Hambidge from Kent, England on March 01, 2015:

He he, I love a read that makes me chuckle! Thank you for this one.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 01, 2015:

Lady Lorelei: The population of the entire world and almost every nation has an increasing percentage of old people. It is due to people living longer and fewer children being born. I can't say specifically for Japan. The Japanese have always been a long-lived people, but I think the birth rate is down also.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on March 01, 2015:

BlossomSB: Glad you enjoyed the jokes and found the statistics interesting. Thank you for commenting.

Lorelei Cohen from Canada on March 01, 2015:

We are indeed an aging population. It is interesting to see the statistics related to age. I wonder if Japans high elderly population is because of their longevity vs ours?

Bronwen Scott-Branagan from Victoria, Australia on February 28, 2015:

Great article. Love the jokes, too. Thanks for all the interesting research and statistics. Interesting.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on February 28, 2015:

lawrence01: Thank you for the joke, the votes, and the share. Young guys can afford to be careless about health; older guys got to stay fit or die. Thanks for your inspirational comment.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on February 28, 2015:

Thanks, FlourshAnyway, for votes and shares. Ain't none of us getting any younger. The young'uns can see what is in their future.

FlourishAnyway from USA on February 28, 2015:

I'm not there yet, but I'm getting there. Very cute hub! Voted up and more and sharing, G+.

Lawrence Hebb from Hamilton, New Zealand on February 28, 2015:

You know you're getting old when your kids call the Fire Department and give them a 'heads up' before lighting the candles on your birthday cake!

I work with a bunch of guys well into their seventies (and still wanting to work) they are more active and fitter than many of the thirty year olds we see on our buses...Something seriously wrong there!

Loved this hub. Voted up and shared

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on February 28, 2015:

Yes, Bill, I thought you would get a kick out of this one. I'm glad you liked it.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on February 28, 2015:

Yes, Bill, I thought you would get a kick out of this one. I'm glad you liked it.

Bill Holland from Olympia, WA on February 28, 2015:

How very nice of you to write a hub about me. LOL Thanks for the great laugh.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on February 28, 2015:

Thank you so much, Ann. I don't dye my hair either. It's streaked with silver. There are some advantages to being old, wisdom, senior discounts, and playing the "old lady" card. Once I stopped dyeing my hair, I noticed people go out of their way to help me. I say being grey-haired is the next best thing to being a big-busted blonde when it comes to getting men to do things for you. Thank you for your praise of my writing style.

Ann Carr from SW England on February 28, 2015:

This is so true, Catherine! It's interesting that Britain is second on the list. I'm a baby boomer and it's a great group to belong to. Sadly, I remember too many 'old' things on your other list.

Love the 'rocking chair feels like a roller coaster'!

The other day my grandson asked me 'Why is your hair white?' I told him it was silver (I don't dye it)!

However, there are some benefits - free bus passes and other discounts and definitely retirement. I love time with the grandchildren and they don't think I'm that old most of the time - my older granddaughter once called me 'wicked', the best compliment ever!

Great hub, full of fascinating facts and fun jokes. Your style is eminently readable.

Ann

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on February 27, 2015:

Jodah: I agree, you have to be really out of it to not know those last three. I think those would have stumped oldsters 10 years ago, however. thanks for your comment and vote.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on February 27, 2015:

lambservant: I came across your first joke, but I had not heard the one about the older engaged couple registering for wedding gifts at the pharmacy. I laughed out loud at that one. Thanks.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on February 27, 2015:

Rochelle: I love your comment. It sounds exactly right. as yu get older, you spend a lot more time at the doctors. Thanks so much for yor comment.

John Hansen from Queensland Australia on February 27, 2015:

Great hub Catherine, and hilarious but true :)

I thought I was getting old until I read the last three....I know the meanings of "tweet, "hooking up" and "being gay"..so I'm ok, besides I have a few years to go before 65....so I feel better now. Voted up.

Lori Colbo from Pacific Northwest on February 27, 2015:

These are great. One I heard the other day is You know you're getting old when you bend over to tie your shoe and wonder what else you can do while you're down there.

I heard a joke about a very elderly couple who were engaged to be married and registered for their wedding gifts at the local pharmacy. Thanks for the pick me up.

Rochelle Frank from California Gold Country on February 27, 2015:

Some good lines here-- now how do we remember them?

I met a man a couple of weeks ago that said that most of his social life was talking to other people in doctors' waiting rooms.

Catherine Giordano (author) from Orlando Florida on February 27, 2015:

Hi PS: Thanks for your vote and share. So glad you liked my humor about aging. Thanks for the votes and shares. Did you know FL where you and I both live has the highest percent of people 65+ of all the states.

Patricia Scott from North Central Florida on February 27, 2015:

Just in case I had any doubt, you have cleared that up for me totally.

Fun fun read!!!!

Voted up++++ shared g+

Angles are on the way to you this evening ps