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How Amazon Makes Me Smile while I Browse

I'm an Un-philosopher and dis-thinker who questions everything & learns from anything. Oh, the inevitability of death and the joy of living!

Shopping on Amazon - the Complete Experience?

Amazon is a super-convenient way to shop for anything. It's got great products, great prices, great offers and great customer service. And you can do all this in the comfort of your home on your phone. The only thing it cannot do predictably is to make you laugh.... or can it?

I've seen some really funny things on Amazon - ranging from typos to technical glitches and reviews and answers which add that extra ounce of much needed smiles to my life. So here I go with a small list of things that made me smile!

The En'title'd Thumb Drive


Somehow this slipped through Amazons various checks. Someone forgot to change the template and the Item Name just comes up as "Title". This also made it's way into the Lightning Deals Page! I wonder what would happen if I purchased this. Would I get a title of "Thumb Drive". So next time I could probably introduce myself as "Hi! I'm USB Stick Benji". That would be so (un)cool.

Hijacking Diapers


It is cut-throat competition among brands at Amazon and Amazon ensures the competition stays tough. The above is a classic example. I searched for Pampers Diapers and the first 2 listings (covering half the screen) were for Huggies - a major competitor. I'm sure the sponsored ads were meant to be that way with keywords like diaper causing the ads to appear, but for the customer it's a major distraction! Thankfully I dod not get hijacked and peacefully purchased my Pampers at a good price with a slight swipe of the finger to scroll down a few inches.

Posting a product on the wrong category is not surprising, but sometimes leaves a very bad impression. Take the above example - I noted this on 2 separate occasions even after I wrote to Amazon. A potent pest killer is listed as a baby product with a great deal on the price. I wonder if anyone actually bought it and, if so, what did they do with it! Maybe it kills baby roaches too.....

Cost Per Kilogram Body Weight - Part 1


Although mathematically it may not actually add up, this sounds like amazing motivation from Amazon for weight loss. The way I see it, you get charged a certain amount based on your present weight. As your weight decreases, the cost of the product comes down and is refunded every month to you. I can't figure out how they do this using technology, but sounds like a great plan if you want to lose weight! All the best!

Cost per Kilogram Body Weight - Part 2


And Amazons obsession with charging per kilogram moves on to babies! They have not spared diapers. I wonder how this works though, as the rates seem to be extremely high. They did warn me that babies can be expensive to take care of, but this is astronomical! How did you work around this?

Is That Even a Review?


Amazon always holds reviews for review before publishing them. They pride themselves in having people filtering out fake reviews, biased reviews, hatred filled reviews, inappropriate reviews and more. Sometimes, they can't figure out what is said and simply let it through.

These are just some sample reviews that make no sense, but certainly are entertaining!

Selling Pets?


I honestly and seriously thought that Amazon was selling animals as pets when I opened the app to see this. Cute? Yes. A million questions flooded my mind. How do they ship them? How do I know the correct size? What if it's a fake? What is their return policy? Any warranties? Does it come with insurance?

I could lay all my questions aside as I realised that it was just pet products that were being sold (food, accessories, etc) and the Amazon marketing team just chose a very cute picture with limited text to get peoples attention. It did work for me though. I had no pets before I saw this. I still have no pets. Thankfully I didn't get tempted or click-baited into buying any pet products that day.

Massive Discounts


Apple is notorious for not offering discounts on their phones, but Amazon managed to squeeze the tech giant into offering a discount when the iPhone 7 was launched. So there you go - a massive discount of 1 rupee (about 1.5 cents) on the iPhone 7 models. I hope the site didn't crash as people clicked away to buy these cheap iPhones!

A Sellers Sense of Humour


Sellers try hard to sell and don't mind using a little sense of humour to push their products through and get these items noticed. Traditionally a play mat is for kids and this looks like the target population for this play mat on amazon is indeed for children. But your eagle eyes should zero in on the recommended age group: 0 to 90 years??!!

I'm sure my grandma would love this play mat and it will brighten up her day to a million degrees. I should buy it for her next birthday. In all honesty, I may enjoy it too as I fall in the recommended age group too. I love how Amazon brings the entire family together.

Brutal Answers


It's not just the Amazon team, reviewers and the sellers that make you laugh. Every question has potential and some users pounce on this opportunity to brighten everyones day. The genuine questions about a pair of gloves on Amazon draw some brutally honest answers. These answers are factually correct, but...hmm.... could have been a little bit more tactful. What do you say?

Babies Go Vrrooom Vrrroom!


Typically a baby bottle teat looks like a little silicone nipple with a collar. This one looks exactly like a toy car to me. In fact it looks like a Hot Wheels toy car. I wonder if it makes the baby go vrrroooom vrrrooom. That could be the little one scooting all over the room or firing out into the diaper. Do you want to take your chances with this product?

Damage Protection Plan for Coffee


My search to quench my thirst for coffee beans ended up with a confused smirk on my face. So the coffee beans costs Rs. 999. For another Rs. 1799, you get a Damage Protection Plan. I wonder if I can use this to my advantage. Will the Damage Protection Plan cover me if I grind the beans and hence have damaged the beans. This could be my ticket to unlimited coffee beans, courtesy Amazon.

Offline is the Best!


And I saved the best for last! If you're ever having a tough day and want something to definitely brighten up and lighten up your day, Amazon can do that for you. Switch off the internet on your phone and open the Amazon app. There will be an error message with a cute dog on it! If you refresh the page or search, another cute dog will appear on the error page. This is your passport to unlimited dog-entered joy. Amazon certainly cares for you!

Thats it for now. I'm sure this story will never end and I'll be seeing several more things on Amazon that will make me smile, grimace, smirk or laugh. Please do me a favour and post some of your Amazon moments here too!!