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Desire - A Commitment

This raining night,
are we having, cold feet?
cause our breaths,
have such warmth.

Wish these drizzles, fizzle sooner,
our natural desire for pleasure,
Lest, fires could rain,
inside our brain.

Probably, the rain god is evaluating our resolve,
towards, the promises and resolutions, we have.

To be together forever, is our dream dreamt.
Containment of contentment, too, is our merit.

Until we've tied, the knot,
as i can, so you can,
stall, this instant gratification.

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Comments 18 comments

shprd74 profile image

shprd74 7 weeks ago from Bangalore Author

Thank you usha madam. You have analysed it to perfection.

- hari


Usha 7 weeks ago

It's nicely deciphered between love, lust, morals n ethics


shprd74 profile image

shprd74 5 months ago from Bangalore Author

Wow. Thanks manatita for visiting this quite an old one.

- hari


manatita44 profile image

manatita44 5 months ago from london

Great poem; highly sensitive and one worthy of merit. I like it.


shprd74 profile image

shprd74 5 months ago from Bangalore Author

Thank you so much reynold. Happy to see your comments and aprreciation.

- hari


Reynold Jay profile image

Reynold Jay 5 months ago from Saginaw, Michigan

Found this gem of a poem and love the two little children in the art. Well done


shprd74 profile image

shprd74 5 months ago from Bangalore Author

very true. thanks noone.

- Hari


noone 6 months ago

The urge of being loved n loving should hv no boundaries, it should be free of all connotations set by us; to express and to feel, should be the only zeal, between lovers. Hari ji ur words convey the wish of fulfilling the unexpressed but heartfelt. Great work


shprd74 profile image

shprd74 9 months ago from Bangalore Author

:-) Thank you sir.

- Hari


Vishnu 9 months ago

Containment and Contentment are very wisely chosen words here.


shprd74 profile image

shprd74 14 months ago from Bangalore Author

Thanks for reading. Pl do view others too.

- hari


gK hegde 14 months ago

excellent! I enjoyed reading


shprd74 profile image

shprd74 15 months ago from Bangalore Author

Thanks for your comments Dora.

In India this is a norm followed by many.

Hope you enjoyed it.


MsDora profile image

MsDora 15 months ago from The Caribbean

I love the last verse. It shares the responsibility of waiting--the way it should be. I endorse the message.


shprd74 profile image

shprd74 15 months ago from Bangalore Author

thanks akriti. do have a look at other ones too.


Akriti Mattu profile image

Akriti Mattu 15 months ago from Shimla, India

Lovely :)


shprd74 profile image

shprd74 15 months ago from Bangalore Author

This was my first romantic attempt.:-). Was a challenge too because of the topic and to make sure feels genuine and not over the board too.

Thanks for appreciating.

- hari


Surabhi Kaura profile image

Surabhi Kaura 15 months ago from Toronto, Canada

Vivid in description. Beautifully written!

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