The world moves on as if nothing changed. People buying groceries, walking their dogs, and having petty little fights on the street. The calmness and the stillness of the leaves give a false sense of security to anyone just taking it all in for one last time. Who knew less than a year ago we would all be standing here, knowing what we know.
The sun is going to die.
When the news first broke, panic ensued for months. People looting, screaming, crying, and realising that in less than a hundred days, everything will turn pitch black. But the panic disappeared as quickly as it came. It wasn’t all a surprise though, not when we can feel the warmth leave us little by little, and soon whether we like it or not, we have to accept it.
Maybe it was the knowledge of our deaths when we really start to live our lives. Frequent travels, the spontaneous burst of people singing on the street, laughing among themselves and having the biggest of celebration for the littlest of events. All the unsaid “I love you" and all the reluctant goodbyes seeped out of every person. The highs and the lows soon calmed down, maybe because everyone had already said what they wanted to say, but really because it was getting colder and colder.
Life continued as usual after the acceptance of death. Now, all we are really waiting for is the end. We are still celebrating our lives, of course, but more covertly. Hidden beneath the awkward smiles and the stiff waves, trying to put some form of warmth out while our surroundings freeze us.
It's unfortunate we have to face a pitch-black future for genuine, kind, caring colours to come out. It would be nice if someone had offered me an umbrella when I was running in the rain trying to catch the last bus, but I suppose having someone still trying to give me a little smile with their frozen lips is pretty good too. Still meekly trying to spread some cheers and good spirits as the darkness loom over us.
So maybe there’s nothing we else can do for ourselves or others as the flames diminish, but we still can continue to weave the fake wool blanket we had been doing for months while ignoring the dropping temperatures. There is no good reason for us to go out in tears. There was already enough of it when the light was still here. So even in the darkness, more so because we’re in complete darkness, we have to bring some light in.
Even if it’s false, even if it’s forced. I don’t think anyone wants to die with a puffy face, so as the sun sets for one last time, turn the corner of your lips up.
“I’ll see you again when the sun comes up.”
© 2022 Alison Lian