Today, I Am
February 7, 2017
Today, I am a stagnant sea,
At face value, no more than an empty pool
Reflecting all those who look into me.
However there is a hurricane in my heart
Jostling the undertow,
Creatures thrashing below,
unwilling to take part
In this massacre,
Bloodshed underneath the water,
But the surface unchanging.
This is the calm before the storm.
February 8, 2017
Today, I am a broken winged sparrow,
Barreling at breakneck speed
Toward no discernible target.
Catapulted off course by a snag in my side,
Unable to breathe for even a moment
I am aching against the aerodynamics,
Destroying my already injured wing
And rapidly unraveling my perfect flight.
I am choked where most birds would sing
I am aching
Because I should have control,
And I do not.
February 9, 2017
Today, I am the morning sun,
Born bright, high, hazy and young.
Innocent before my journey.
I am beautiful long before I stain the sky orange and red,
Beautiful long before I bring the day to a close,
And welcome the darkness of the night.
I am beautiful in a different way now that I have scarred the sky.
Though still they marvel at me,
Damaged though I may be,
February 10, 2017
Today, I am a tightly wound coil,
Insecurity clenched in my crippling grip.
Any minute now,
I am poised to snap,
And the pain to which I am tightly bound,
Will find its release through the cracks in my rapidly rupturing metal armour,
No longer attacking just the beating heart within my own chest,
But also preying on the people that glow most within my darkness,
And I fail to articulate my desire to find a means to an end.
And all I can do is watch,
As my internal flame flashes,
And hope to god I'm remembered
As more than embers and ashes.
Feburary 13, 2017
Today, I am a two toned chord,
Craving a connection as complete and continuous
As that of a musician and his instrument.
But you are the missing piece of my melody,
The key that my slender fingers cannot reach,
The other side of a canyon that I cannot cross.
And I have always been controversially inclined,
But somehow the beat of my heart
Always in sync and on cue,
matches up with the drum of yours
Everytime it plays for you.
February 14, 2017
Today, I am a lackluster grey,
Bland, blank, lifeless.
Craving the touch of a lover
To mix me into a new, different, beautiful color.
I am born an alloy,
Of equal measure light and dark.
Struggling to lift my head above this shade,
An unbearable hue.
And where is the honor in this story?
I do not come out glittering, shimmering, or smooth;
I am still awaiting my metamorphosis
Though change may not even be necessary.
Perhaps all I must do,