That sentence, it had to take a lot of courage, practice it over and over, cry on the pillow so many times, to be able to muster up the courage to say it.
People say it's emotionless, there are so many people who want to heal their parents and stay together.
What child does not want his family to always be happy.
It too, also wants to have a happy family. What if you're not happy?
Still trying to grit my teeth to endure, sacrifice for my children, so that I can have a complete home, but is the roof really warm?
Or the endless quarrels that keep repeating in the memory.
Then the meals are not healthy, the soup is not sweet, no one will give up, angry at the fish cutting boards, cursing at the heads of children who do not understand.
Later, in his dreams, he still heard the terrible scolding in his ears.
He used to think in the future that he had to try to earn a lot of money so that his parents wouldn't argue anymore, he rushed in like a moth in spite of his efforts, but what if he had money? Still the same, even worse, his parents are still arguing, still at odds for the smallest reasons. What is marriage, why should it be so hard.
"Why don't you get a divorce?"
"I'm afraid that later when you get married, people will look down on you, and the neighbors will laugh at you, you won't be able to get a divorce in the future."
He knows that the saying "get a picky wife and marry a picky man" has been instilled in the blood of the rural people, which is hard to change.
But he wants to tell his mother that the fact that he is despised by people just because his parents are divorced, he is ready to end that relationship, because if people truly understand and love him, he will make up for the hurt. It's not about judging or judging disrespectfully. And if he really chose the wrong person, that's his fault.
"I will never blame you, but I will blame myself for being afraid of the ties that make my parents unable to find new happiness. Neighbors can't live their lives for me. Why force people stay together all their lives when they're not happy? People don't laugh when their parents get divorced, they laugh when they persist in being together all their lives when they're not happy."
All fell into silence. It's completely empty inside. He didn't know if the moment was right or wrong, but he actually breathed a sigh of relief.
"Parents get a divorce. Parents must be happy to be happy."
Drops of water will start to fall. He didn't dare look at those familiar faces because he was afraid he wouldn't be able to hold back his emotions either.
If you really can't try, give each other a chance to free yourself, otherwise remember the reason at the beginning to try together.
The petition is still there. Continue or stop, only the insider has the right to decide, to know what to do.
"These days, I see that your parents are very affectionate, no more arguing, you go home."
Her cousin called. Turning off the phone, it cried like a baby. I don't know how long it's been since he came home, didn't call to ask his parents.
Not every ending is happy, it's just that it's luckier than others that its parents also understand and try to forgive and yield to each other, not for any other reason.
Thinking about the saying that year, the corner of his eyes still stings, hoping that later, when he enters the difficult marriage journey, he can have enough faith and sanity to not have to hear that sentence again. "My parents are divorced".
© 2022 PHAM HOANG BAO YEN