Locked Up Again

Updated on December 20, 2019
Another Blackout
Another Blackout | Source

I decided to try moving outside my comfort zone of poetry.

I have made an attempt at flash fiction. All critique welcome to let me know if I am on the right track


The Blackout


Charlie woke up and looked at his surroundings. “Oh, not again!”he said under his breath, as he realised he was in a police cell. Charlies problems with alcohol had been going on for more years than he cared to remember, but wakening up in a police cell was becoming a more regular occurrence. His drinking had been escalating and the horrors of blackouts and not remembering where you had been or what you had done had become the norm.

This time was different, they had taken his clothes, he was wearing a disposable coverall and his hands were covered in blood. Oh my god what have I done? He thought as he broke into a cold sweat. He could be a pest when drunk but had never been violent. His mind is racing with all sort of crazy thoughts as he tries hard to remember, but everything was blank, all he can remember is being in his usual bar and then waking up in this cell. He starts to sob uncontrollably please god let there be some simple explanation and I promise I will never drink again.

The police officer opened his cell door Charlie looks at him with a tear stained face. “Have I done something really bad”? He asked. “You’re a lucky boy Charlie,” the officer said. “We thought we were arresting you on suspicion of committing a serious offence when we found you covered in blood, but it turns out you are a hero. The paramedics told our officers at the scene that an old paramedic colleague had helped save the man’s life by putting pressure on his wound until they arrived and had then staggered off.

Charlie has not had a drink since that day.


Questions & Answers

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      • drylen profile imageAUTHOR

        Charlie Halliday 

        4 weeks ago from Scotland

        Thanks Bill.

      • billybuc profile image

        Bill Holland 

        4 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Nice job, moving out of your comfort zone. I have never tried flash fiction. Maybe I'm too verbose for it. :)

      • drylen profile imageAUTHOR

        Charlie Halliday 

        5 weeks ago from Scotland

        Thank you Brenda

      • Brenda Arledge profile image

        BRENDA ARLEDGE 

        5 weeks ago from Washington Court House

        I agree with John. It is great to try new things.

        I loved the ending too...so glad you were the hero.

        Nice write.

      • drylen profile imageAUTHOR

        Charlie Halliday 

        6 weeks ago from Scotland

        Thanks John. I had planned to write my message on the dangers of alcohol blackouts in a poem but thought this story might paint a better picture.

      • Jodah profile image

        John Hansen 

        6 weeks ago from Queensland Australia

        It’s great to see you branching out and trying your hand at flash fiction, Charlie. Good story and love how the ending turned out.

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