Iris Vs. The Psychotic Lawnmower Cult: The Struggle Continues

Updated on April 12, 2018
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Heather has a Bachelor's Degree in English from Moravian College and has been freelance writing for more than 10 years.

A good girl who always naively believed that kindness ruled all

It trumped money, success and presenting a perfect image

As she got older, she realized that most people were liars

Pretended to care about your existence one moment

And rolling their eyes behind your back right after your talk

Her petals wilted with each metaphorical verbal jab

The gardening sheers cutting deeper and deeper

Mother Nature's private knife into the heart of green thumbs

Eager for spring to come and start planting their favorite tulips

Thought she cleared the weeds and branch debris

When she arrived on Monday morning to clear the proverbial air

Fellow gardener/Judas looked like a confused deer in tractor lights

Made our under siege heroine doubt her own self confidence plant

Growing inside her mind's eye as the week started off with a bang

Albeit a half conscience one of course since it was another early day

Midweek back to the same old insult and anger grindstone

One upset while the other walks away in preschool type of tantrum

A stalemate that won't end because the other won't relent

Frightened by the reveal of the newly purchased fleet of John Deer mowers

Shiny and gift wrapped to cause some mayhem to lawns and Irises everywhere

Full of premium unleaded from the nearest Sunoco gas station

With a back-up full gas can ready to go for extra mowing assignments

Assassinations of numerous gardens ready to commence

Tired of the backstabbing among the row of prisoners planting and plotting

Looking out the window into parked car oblivion for the exit and Waldo

Desperate for a constructive night's sleep and an even better morning

Weekend fast approaching, but not fast enough for her

Either need a vacation or a Stanley fix

Looks like the latter more feasible than the former

Take whatever the doctor ordered and run with it.

Start of a new army of terror.
Start of a new army of terror.

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