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A Stroll Down Writer's Block

Whenever I experience writer's block I take immediate action, and never let it set in for long.

Set the Chaotic Mood


Hello, stranger, my name is Kyler but around here I'm better known as the greeter. Welcome to Writer's Block! From here, until the end of this tour, I expect you to remain silent, attentive, and by my side at all times. For your own safety and if you wish to return at some point, please, avoid interacting with the other inhabitants of Writer's Block during the tour. If at any point you wish to end the tour, please, let me know as soon as possible so that I may proceed to laugh in your face and remind you of the rules that included remaining silent. So, let us begin the tour!

Getting Your Bearings

As you can see, the entryway into Writer's Block is dark and uninviting, everything past it seems to be winding on ad infinitum, and rest assured that your perceptions are not deceiving you. Let's get moving into the abyss so we can help you get your bearings, hahahaha! Oh, yeah, the clanking of your chains just reminded me to tell you that you're never going to get used to those; they grip just tight enough around your ankles that every little movement causes them to cut a bit deeper.

Now I know this is your first time into the void that is Writer's Block, and it can be a bit scary, perhaps you even feel hopeless, but we all pop in and out every now and again at random intervals against our own will so there is no need to fight it and try to escape immediately. Your temporary stay here should be one of curious exploration, and if I were you that is how I would treat it lest you decide to stay put and embrace eternity. Go forwards, go backwards, it doesn't matter; here in Writer's Block so long as you are going somewhere, then you are going somewhere, hahahahaha!


Frightening Featureless Figures

I'd like to point your attention to the walls that are now melting down themselves and into the floor, and the frightening featureless figures within that are gesturing to you; please, for your own sake, I'd rather not see you become one of them. Every imbecile who followed their beckoning in the past, against my advice, has never been seen again. However, it is said that every witless victim to the walls adds another featureless figure and when you put two and two together I'm sure you can see why I advise against interacting with them.

The figures in the walls aren't the only ones here, there are those that wander this endless, dark corridor, and you can actually interact with them. You won't get much substance from them, however, as they all just mumble and nothing they say really makes sense. Sometimes they manage to throw a few coherent words in with the mumbling, but more often than not they just continue to wander aimlessly, just like you'll be doing, hahahahaha!


Many Doors but No Exits

Hey look, it's the first door on our little tour, and I know what you are thinking. You're thinking that we should open it, and I couldn't disagree more, hahahahaha, but I'll indulge your curiosity a little bit. Before I do let me dash your hopes and dreams of escaping through it, these are doors of observation that cannot be passed through, only opened. You never know what you are going to find behind them and each one opens another bit of your past, present, or future. What you see behind this door may change and warp itself each time you close and open it, and the longer you dwell the more it mutates.

Now that we have dawdled here discussing the door have you noticed the walls? The featureless figures have been inching closer to us ever so slowly, don't dwell near a door too long and forget that they want you to be a part of this place forever. I've seen it happen, people begin to dwell and sit in front of the doors mesmerized and the figures get their chance to suck them in violently. If you look close enough, some of the doors have entire finger nails and claw marks on the floors in front of them from where previous sods tried to fight back as they got sucked into the walls. They should've heeded my warnings. You don't strike me as the type to dwell for too long, but I don't let you speak so what do I know? Hahahahaha! Let's keep moving, I'm almost done and this is getting boring.


Simplicity Is Key

Writer's Block is a simple place, with simple rules, and I've handed you them all on a silver platter. What I have not handed you is the key to escape, or haven't I? I know you're wondering, and always will be wondering what the key to getting out of Writer's Block is, and you can sleep easy knowing that we are all wondering the same thing and none of us have a specific answer for you. As I said earlier, curious exploration seems to be the best option. Never stay in one place for too long.

The telltale signs of impending escape from Writer's Block are already showing themselves when you reach the corridors with windows that allow light to shine through. I know the cold metal bars make escape seem impossible, and you're not going to be able to brute force your way through them, trust me, people have tried and only ended up tired and hopeless; but you can't take that light for granted and stop to bask in it, keep moving.

As the windows get bigger, and the natural light brighter, you'll focus less on the figures within the melting walls and more on the beautiful landscape outside the unforgiving and unrelenting bars. Heck, you may even start sprinting in excitement as everything seems to loosen up on your psyche, even those chains on your ankles will seem to disappear, hahahaha! It is then that you need to look forward at the endless corridor of Writer's Block, as it now has a big, inviting red door at the end. It has no knob, nor any other discerning features other than the fact it has creases between itself and the door frame. Please, feel free and encouraged to dropkick that sucker right off its hinges, anything less will see it moving away from you as if it had its own will and you'll be right back here at the entrance.

What awaits on the other side of that elusive red door will welcome you with open arms, and upon smashing through it your escape from Writer's Block will have been a success. But you'll be back, everyone comes back, and when you do I'll be waiting with a smile, hahahahaha!


Kyler J Falk (author) from California on March 12, 2020:

Thank you so much, Meg!

DreamerMeg from Northern Ireland on March 12, 2020:

Brilliant piece of writing! Really enjoyed that, very innovative. Good points in it too.

Kyler J Falk (author) from California on March 11, 2020:

Thank you, Mark, though I hope no one takes this literally and goes dropkicking red doors in a fit of passion, hahaha!

Mark Tulin from Palm Springs, California on March 11, 2020:

A practical story for all writers. Nice job.

Kyler J Falk (author) from California on March 11, 2020:

It would seem that my writer's block only applies to non-fiction. I can hammer out entire foundations and mini-stories for fictional universes with ease, but as of now I can't do a single non-fiction article without it feeling robotic and lacking a true voice. Thank you, Pamela!

Pamela Oglesby from Sunny Florida on March 11, 2020:

This article was fun to read and writer's block is a good topic. I guess writer's block is not a problems for you. Haha

Kyler J Falk (author) from California on March 10, 2020:

Thank you, Brenda, if only for a short while it did serve to ease the block.

BRENDA ARLEDGE from Washington Court House on March 10, 2020:


This little story of yours is quite amusing.

You pull me in right in the beginning.

I believe it was successful in easing your writer's block.

Great story.

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