A Black Rush of Nothingness

Updated on June 2, 2018

The quiet of the boarding room house over on Grant Street was suddenly broken by the sound of gun fire. It seemed to becoming through one of the walls, which Mitch Barr could see as he flicked on the light. When he stared in that direction, the light seem to be fading a bit. There was a smoky haze forming around and he couldn't understand why that was. His body felt warm and he forced his eyes to see through the haze. There he saw shadows created by the smoke and then dissipate.

“Is everything okay?” he shouted.

There was no answer and no movement.

He walked closer to the wall and he labored while doing so. The haze parted as he pressed his left air against the wall.

Suddenly there was another shot. He gasped, trying to focus more intently. The heat shot through him and a wave of coldness held him for a moment. He shook it off and the heat returned immediately.

There was a voice that whispered through the wall telling Mitch Barr that a greater reality would soon make everything clear.

For a moment he thought about his life. He thought about all his children and his wife who he had lost to cancer several years ago. He thought about the toll that took on him. He thought about his brothers and sisters who were no longer living. He thought about all the happy thoughts and the memories that he had been trying so hard not to lose but had felt slowly slipping away after he turned 80.

He rubbed the wall with his hands and felt a couple of holes. They were not big, but still noticeable. He didn't remember the holes being there, but nevertheless they were. A loud scream shot through the wall knocking him back a few steps as he felt his heart pounding. He felt the sweat dripping from his face as he wiped it away, but it didn't help.

Suddenly, there was a woman standing in front of him. She was a young woman with long black hair and olive skin. He knew her, but didn't recognize her. He tried to speak but the words failed.

Mitch Barr turned toward the woman and she smiled.

He tried to speak again, but nothing came out.

She walked toward him and he suddenly felt her hands on his face. Without warning, a black rush of nothingness roared down from above, directly between him and the woman, and obliterated all the mental sights and memories of his loved ones. Instinctively, he jumped back.

Mitch Barr paused and closed his eyes for a moment, trying to remember his own name. He honestly didn't know who he was.

The young woman moved closer again as she tried to steer him toward the chair. He resisted as her soft gentle hands squeezed his face. She stepped back and made a big embrace as if she were hugging him, and with her eyes wide she blew him an over-exaggerated kiss.

The next few moments became a blur as he tried adjusting his visuals. He wiped his eyes and finally saw the young woman again. The woman wanted him to turn and face the chair, but he couldn't get over the loss of memory which was a complete emptiness.

She bowed her head and stood completely still. He titled his head a bit sideways and then he decided to turn to face the chair. He knew sorrow and even though he couldn't remember it, he felt the residuals holding him tightly.

Quiet descended as Mitch Barr took in the horror. He could hear the hush of angel wings caressing the heavens. His eyes were glazing over the mental turmoil that was sitting in his chair. He wasn't sure what to say or do as he just stared intently.

She took his hand and they began to walk toward the wall. As he approached the bullet holes, he slowed, turned slowly and his memory returned. It was as if he was standing outside himself as his other self was on the chair with a bullet hole in his neck, and another one on the side of his head. That man in the chair was shot twice and died instantly.

Questions & Answers

    © 2018 Frank Atanacio

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      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        2 months ago from Shelton

        you are so very welcome...

      • Li-Jen Hew profile image

        Li-Jen Hew 

        2 months ago

        Thanks Frank! X)

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        2 months ago from Shelton

        oh wow congratulations Li-Jen

      • Li-Jen Hew profile image

        Li-Jen Hew 

        2 months ago

        hahah....this why I am here..To make you more free. You're talking about my own job or this cleaning? haha...my own job is fine. Graduating this year.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        2 months ago from Shelton

        LOL I know I haven so very busy.. so how is the job working out?

      • Li-Jen Hew profile image

        Li-Jen Hew 

        2 months ago

        Stopped by for some spring cleaning around the comment boxes. Cobwebs everywhere! 6 months is long.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        8 months ago from Shelton

        thank you so much Shyron

      • Shyron E Shenko profile image

        Shyron E Shenko 

        8 months ago from Texas

        Frank, I was overwhelmed with sadness when Mitch's memories disappeared and relieved when they returned. This story held me spellbound.

        Blessings my friend

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        8 months ago from Shelton

        Thank you so much Yves and Robert for reading my flash... bless you both...:) Frank

      • Robert Sacchi profile image

        Robert Sacchi 

        8 months ago

        I enjoyed reading this story about a violent end of and a crossing over to eternity.

      • savvydating profile image

        Yves 

        8 months ago

        Hi Frank....Thought I'd hop on over to see what you're up to. I see you've written another fascinating piece. At first, I had thought that Mitch had not died instantly. So relieved to find out that he did...but what a way to go. Thank goodness the dark haired woman was there to help him move forward.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        8 months ago from Shelton

        didnt mean to make you feel awkward.. :(

      • Li-Jen Hew profile image

        Li-Jen Hew 

        8 months ago

        hahaha. thanks. X/.... this is my awkward, nervous smiley. all the best Frank!

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        8 months ago from Shelton

        yes just een very busy.. but never for you

      • Li-Jen Hew profile image

        Li-Jen Hew 

        8 months ago

        Hi Mr Atanacio! ...I needed catching up with HP and found u havent started anything new...everything ok? hahaha

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        8 months ago from Shelton

        thanks Richard hope all is well with you and your family

      • thelyricwriter profile image

        Richard Ricky Hale 

        8 months ago from West Virginia

        My man!!! Good to hear from you brother! The art, suspense and a thriller as always. Master storytelling at its best. Such a talent Frank, straight from the heart.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        thank you Dana Tate

      • Dana Tate profile image

        Dana Tate 

        9 months ago from LOS ANGELES

        Another masterpiece. You're crime thrillers always leave me panting for more.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        thank you so much for reading my black rush...

      • profile image

        John M McNally 

        9 months ago

        Tremendous flash fiction Frank, as always.

        Reading your stories feels like knowing that someone is creeping up behind you but being too afraid to turn around - until it's too late, the twist gets you every time.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        yeah you are.. specs? Like my glasses?

      • Li-Jen Hew profile image

        Li-Jen Hew 

        9 months ago

        Haha truth is, I cry alone. I haven't heard that phrase in a long time. I don't need your shoulders...I need your specs...nehh...just making things more confusing. :)

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        so you got it? Ha..... I knew you would

      • Li-Jen Hew profile image

        Li-Jen Hew 

        9 months ago

        Hahah, then I wasn't in the mood to cry...otherwise I would be thinking of that right? Hehehe

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        Yo Li-Jen... LOL Shoulders to cry on...

      • Li-Jen Hew profile image

        Li-Jen Hew 

        9 months ago

        Yo Frank. We're not done with our conversation. What is it with shoulders? Hahah. I want to understand you even though you are soooooo soooooo soooo far away from me.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        Peggy Woods you are too kind... bless you

      • Peggy W profile image

        Peggy Woods 

        9 months ago from Houston, Texas

        I would like to think that the young woman leading him to the afterlife was his wife when she was young and that they would soon spend eternity together in happiness. All things would once again become clear.

        You are a master at weaving these stories together.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        Peg Cole thank you for always supporting my writing ..bless you

      • PegCole17 profile image

        Peg Cole 

        9 months ago from Northeast of Dallas, Texas

        Frank, you've done it again - captured evasive moments of these eerie experiences of what it must feel like to die. I love your descriptions of the flash of memories and the aftermath along with the realization that life has passed.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        Yeah Nell Rose, but did you love this one? LOL kidding thanks for visiting this page..:)

      • Nell Rose profile image

        Nell Rose 

        9 months ago from England

        I love your stories, all compacted in a small piece, wonderful!

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        Oh.. hi there Li-Jen.. thanks for stopping by... :) Frank

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        Hari.. thanks for stopping by

      • Li-Jen Hew profile image

        Li-Jen Hew 

        9 months ago

        Hey Frank! Innovative story. One that revolves around a chair and can lead to other things. Thanks for the share! :)

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        Yes Julian you hit it right on the head.. Got several emails telling me that they did not leave comments because they couldn't understand the flash fiction. I didn't think it was that difficult, I thought I was wrong until your comment.. or perhaps you just recognize it right away... thank you so much.. Frank

      • shprd74 profile image

        Hari Prasad S 

        9 months ago from Bangalore

        Frank, you are a possessed man. Coolest crime writer of hubpages.

        - hari

      • JulianLane profile image

        Julian Lane 

        9 months ago from Yorba Linda, CA

        Frank... This is so good. I love how you handle the subject matter with such sureness yet subtly you force me to think about such things as is there an afterlife, and how random acts of evil or unintended outcomes surround us without our knowledge. You are a true weaver of words that grip my imagination and challenge my paradigms.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        Sean thank you for supporting my work..my friend..

      • Sean Dragon profile image

        Ioannis Arvanitis 

        9 months ago from Greece, Almyros

        It is amazing how you can balance between hazy and clear, innuendo and obvious! This is talent. I bow to you, my friend, Frank.

        Respect!

        Sean

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        All I can say is thank you..:)

      • Genna East profile image

        Genna East 

        9 months ago from Massachusetts, USA

        All I can say, is "Wow!" Just brilliant, Frank.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        bent not broken LOL

      • clivewilliams profile image

        Clive Williams 

        9 months ago from Jamaica

        Great...now I know all writers are broke!

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        I agree Rinita...:) And Clive you got the stinky part right...LOL

      • clivewilliams profile image

        Clive Williams 

        9 months ago from Jamaica

        Very beautiful piece Frank. You must be stinking rich by now with all these movie clip writings.

      • Senoritaa profile image

        Rinita Sen 

        9 months ago

        Elusiveness is the first step to clarity!!

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        so you understood the ending?..alas!!! someone did thanks MsDora

      • MsDora profile image

        Dora Weithers 

        9 months ago from The Caribbean

        You really master the layout of the plot to avoid giving away the ending before it ends. Never read it this way before. Exceptional!

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        thanks for stopping by Rinita... I thought it was clear as to what was happening, but I guess I'm wrong :(

      • Senoritaa profile image

        Rinita Sen 

        9 months ago

        You had me with the alternating heat and cold!! And now I have to go back to re-reading a Christie!

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        really manatita.. harder to figure out? Thanks for that tid bit...:)

      • manatita44 profile image

        manatita44 

        9 months ago from london

        Less gripping. Harder to figure out. The woman, the chair, the wall... a touch more mystery.

        Another excellent piece.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        Bill thanks for stopping by... have a good Sunday

      • billybuc profile image

        Bill Holland 

        9 months ago from Olympia, WA

        Right about now I'm happy my name isn't Mitch Barr. :)

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        Flourish and John thanks for visiting this page...:)

      • Jodah profile image

        John Hansen 

        9 months ago from Queensland Australia

        A rivetting read, Frank. You da master.

      • FlourishAnyway profile image

        FlourishAnyway 

        9 months ago from USA

        This was really compelling reading. You sure know how to write. I wanted to go put him in the chair myself.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        thank you Nithya and Eric for visiting my page...:)

      • Vellur profile image

        Nithya Venkat 

        9 months ago from Dubai

        Brilliant, spellbound from beginning to end.

      • Ericdierker profile image

        Eric Dierker 

        9 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

        Frank I loved your portrayal of me as Mitch. Fantastic. I am so in there. Maybe you are Gandolf. You tore me away from my boy and it was well worth it.

      • Frank Atanacio profile imageAUTHOR

        Frank Atanacio 

        9 months ago from Shelton

        Thank you Ann Carr and Coffee Queen for visiting my black rush...:)

      • Coffeequeeen profile image

        Louise Powles 

        9 months ago from Norfolk, England

        I love reading your stories Frank. Thanks for posting. I always enjoy reading them.

      • annart profile image

        Ann Carr 

        9 months ago from SW England

        Wow! That was mind-blowing, Frank. I was caught up in the action and the emotion. Brilliant!

        Ann

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